Best Forsaking Poems
Faraway, across a widening
Expanse of vacant fields,
Dawns slated light is gradually
Awaking;
And too soon new Morn's stilled
Indifference
Determinedly steals
Into the abstractions of my fitful
Dreams,
Where, deeply concealed,
Many forgotten memories from days
Since past -
Ne'er once unto me unworthy...
Although long be they in their
Forsaking.
Those languid days, that, lately,
I quite often see and hear
Crowding throughout my wandering
Slumbers;
Vivid recollections, interns of a
Jumbled mind - for ages absent,
Beginning now to inexplicably reappear;
Insistent murmurings troubling -
Troubling incessantly:-
Unwelcomed guests from
Yesteryear...
Strange impositions, of a sorts,
Burdening upon this weary soul,
Which, encamped within my
Dampened Spirits -
Doth so unwittingly encumber!
In a world void of trust and loyalty
It's hard to find a happy family
It's as though it's nothing unusual in this country
Said air thick with vulgarity, disdain, and incivility
I lock my mind and turn to music, obstructing the cacophony
Blocking its aim to drain my will, continuing on with probity
Soothing songs of faith wash through my soul, guarding my tranquility
An Angel stalked my better-half through my mind
Questioning our flawless design
Angel: "What is a beast if you grant it introspection?"
Man: "It's still an animal, yet closer to imperfection."
"What is a dog with no will to live?"
"A dog with a will always has hope to give."
"But dogs cannot contemplate, they simply are."
"Yet humans can, is it an improvement or a scar?"
"Undying love is a gift you bear!"
"What good is it when it hurts to care?"
"That is the beauty of woman and man!"
"But what is it, what truth is there to understand?"
"That is for God to tell"
"If our questions go unheard, I'm glad we fell."
"You've only fallen if you fail to see."
"I don't see god, but I can feel the animal in me."
"You would deny your God given status?"
"If God made us so great, then why can't we kill the bestial urges inside us?"
"Some people dwell closer to sin."
"Yet none of us can handle the animal within."
"I cannot help you if you can't agree."
"Only if I agree you will set me free?"
"Only with the glory of God can we save you and your kind."
"You cannot help me, you are just within my mind."
With that the Angel fell dead
The man stared calmly toward nothing and shot himself in the head
I always try to run from the confusion
Any escape has become a delusion
When i look down at my heart
I see it torn apart
There is nothing left inside of me
Just broken hearts and pointless dreams
My future becomes all hopless and frayed
The end of me can only be delayed
I've lost all remaining hope
Now i have no way left to cope
After papa succumbed
to congestive heart failure
October 7th, 2020 yours truly
neglected fulfilling promised score.
I did shirk maintaining bond
with youngest sister
who when a boy especially fond
regarding said sibling
whereat myself and and Shari Todd
played cat and mouse
chasing each other to pond
necessitating both of us to traverse
wooded thicket simultaneously
waving our magic wand.
Boyhood of mine chock full of memories
framing me and most favorite playmate
requiring keen eye to distinguish
one scrawny little lad no one would debate
impossible mission to discern
thirty three month age difference,
cuz we appeared to naked eye
as identical twins.
Flickering images of yesteryear
pepper memory faculty where
froze frieze in time
trigger an errant tear
trickling down cheek,
when impish gonif nsync
with me comprised pair
of inseparable Harris offspring
in sum re: portrayed analogy
likened to everyday idyllically kleer
pitch perfect courtesy
weatherman/woman maker engineer.
Our late father though cremated
would if alive furrow ashen brow
aware how Matthew Scott remiss
and no longer doth bother
(essentially incommunicado between
himself and kid sister
ever since she left home
at age seventeen)
for greener pastures,
which meadow (for success -
defined as transcending
her inherent limitations)
sowed the seeds
of her life reaped with utmost
plentitude of hardihood.
Her sixty first birthday
arrives six days from today
(October eleventh two thousand
and twenty two) - decades spanned
with nary acknowledgement
expressed courtesy sole brother manned
existence floundering like a fish
in treacherous waters
barely gasping breath
as he felt afflicted with chronic anxiety
emotionally whipsawed hither and yon
to and fro across
unwritten pages of his life.
Yours truly attests feeling aghast
once upon a time resorting
to self starvation initially omitting breakfast
subsequently forgoing every meal
prepubescence witnessed absent enthusiast
for livingsocial hence,
my death I chose to forecast
fortunately no coroner
called to perform autopsy inquest
about which severe
psychological suicidal ambition I jest.
yesterday's love underneath my pillow...
at night before I go to sleep...
hoping that dreams of you are sweet...
yearning to dream of that far off place...
where we explored possibilities...
hot kisses given in candlelight...
a brush with passion, whispered sighs...
I float, weightless, over deserted beach...
past boardwalks and haunted seascapes...
through shuttered, cobwebbed vacant rooms...
candlewax remnants on a dusty floor...
searching high and low for what evades...
the sun rises high seeping through my blinds...
the pillowcase wet from forsaking dreams...