Best Cashiers Poems
It's one week till Christmas
And we've had enough
Of grumpy old shoppers
Complaining about stuff.
They hate the line-ups,
They hate the cashiers.
They won't be happy
Till they have us in tears.
The things they are after
Are long gone from the store.
They find it incredulous
We won't be getting more.
Last minute shoppers
Are a pain in the rump.
Each night by closing
This place looks like a dump.
One more week to go,
I sure hope we make it
But in the meantime
We'll just smile and fake it.
Daily, we look at strangers such as cashiers; they see us too.
Removed from them, can we describe their faces? Can they describe ours?
Invisibility seems part of the human condition.
Written Feb. 20, 2017 for the Invisible Contest of Lewis Raynes
Come sit by the fire... let's reminisce
About this and that, about life and love
Watching a robin take its first flight
Or a squirrel scurrying up a tree
The sun coming out from behind the clouds
The gentle breeze blowing the leaves in fall
The gentle snow flakes softly falling in winter
Covering the ground like a warm blanket
Or is it the laughter of a baby
The purring of a kitten
The sound of cows mooing in the field
The twinkling stars on a warm summer's eve
A shooting star
The hum of the city
Which tells us we're one of many
Enjoying life on this amazing planet of ours
The roar of a jet engine
Taking people away on a happy vacation
The sound of a marching band
The smile on the cashiers face
As she wishes you a great day
So many images throughout life
Remind us how amazing it is to be alive
To experience these simple pleasures
To conjure up these amazing vignettes
Of the wonders we see and feel every day
I still remember my very first day at school
That was seventy-three years ago
But it's just like it was yesterday
Attending my very first baseball game
And none other than Jackie Robinson
Playing second base for the Montreal Royals
In his very first professional game
I could go on and on but as I age
My memory is not as reliable as it once was
Memories are wonderful to try to hold on to
To look back on a life filled with happiness and joy
Of course, there were some sad times
But they were far outnumbered
By just the simple pleasures we all experience
My life was amazing!
© Jack Ellison 2014
George Orwell tried to tell 1984
but here's what 1984 told us
1984 was the year we had
The Terminator
the ultimate movie
about Artificial Intelegence
with the ability to travel through time
Today we have AI
Let me be the first to name it
The Terminator
It also has the ability
to pass through time
Soon there will be
no need for employees
No taxi drivers, no cashiers
No stock brokers, no managers
No teachers, No cops
No salesmen, No clocks
What need have we
for prejudice people
they only waste our time
Soon you won't
be able to buy or sell
unless you have AI.
When did a lie become an alternative truth?
Why are parking spaces so small?
Do subway riders even know deodorant exists?
Why do jaywalkers ignore red lights?
Why do kids never wash their hands before they eat?
Why do people spell doubt and subtle with a "b"?
Why have twenty checkouts and only two cashiers?
Why are there no cops around when you need one?
Why do people peddle religion door-to-door?
And why didn't these annoying things bother me before?
A few more things to add to my list of gripes.
Why wasn't I warned that life could be so screwed up?
Why are there no washrooms handy when you need to piss?
And why do tips get automatically added to the cost of a meal?
Why are interest rates on credit cards so outrageous?
And why won't the deliveryman deliver to my apartment door?
I know I've been ranting a lot, but there's so much more:
like roads that never get plowed,
people who pay for groceries by check,
and cars that park on narrow city streets.
Oh, and what about coffee that's too hot to drink?
These are but a few of the things
that contribute to my anxiety and frustration.
It’s been three weeks
since I was in the grocery store,
and an emptiness weighs,
as if I’d lost a friend.
The government issued orders
for people like me,
calling it “social distancing.”
“Stay home,” they say.
Going to a place containing what I need--
things like crumbled feta cheese,
or low sodium pasta sauce,
is like being with a trusted companion.
Greeting cashiers by name
makes each spree a social event,
as well as a lifesaving one
that refills the pantry.
My last visit began with an App,
where I selected what I wanted,
and ended when a stranger
put bags into the back of my car.
My larder might be full,
but my heart feels empty--
deprived of its weekly ritual
of hunting and gathering with friends.
Small birds,
Protect us!
Psychopaths,
Neurotic princesses,
Bakers and pastry chefs,
Protect us,
Incomplete journalists,
Sociopaths,
French poets,
Small birds,
Protect us!
Wealthy fish merchants,
Vicious cashiers,
vanitous athletes,
Small birds,
Protect us!
Virile sanitation workers,
Small electricians
May your voices be raised
Higher than theirs.
He who loves no one,
Think about everyone,
He thinks about stupid cashiers,
To the journalist who has fun with him,
To the war in middle East
he can’t hear the birds,
The titmouse with a turquoise heart,
The blackbird with its head so green,
He who loves no one,
Cannot understand horses,
Nor admire the large cruise ships,
Like Ulysses before the sirens,
He thinks of everyone.
It's two weeks till Christmas
And the store is a zoo.
The customers are grumpy
And I guess we are too.
Whatever they're after
Has already been sold.
If all the tinsels silver,
You can bet they want gold.
The cashiers are all working
As fast as they can.
Would serve the shoppers right
If we just up and ran.
In retail it's hectic
This time of the year
So no matter what happens
Don't let them see fear.
The one day we're closed
Will be Christmas Day
And we've all asked Santa
For an increase in pay.
No exception, we grab a cart
A slice of this geography
A part of this society. Among the lines of people shopping,
talking, grazing, cell phones buzzing
cashiers checking, shoppers queuing,
wheels are churning
cards are scanning,
as we chew on something new.
Looking for the latest deal. Should we try it? Should be buy it?
The great appeal of mindless thrill
I am shopping, child in tow
Buying dog food, fifty pounds
Then, to the car with chirping sounds
from this child (she is my grand)
who now observes a woman, pale,
with a skinny hound,
sheltered near the parking lot.
A homeless woman, I'm confounded
how to help this hungry soul
_
This sweet grandchild is more endowed
to take a stand for that old hound
She's convinced to do some good
And so you know...
back in we go, where we once stood,
standing in the check-out line
We're in the store for more dog-food
A bag we buy, perhaps a few
We add some goods, a thing or two
This child with me is so astute
pointing to those gift cards too
to feed them both, as well we should
Approaching, we are taking care
to let her think it's for the dog
But in the bag, we left our hearts, we left a smile
The one we kept will last awhile
__________________________________________________________
True Story:
2/9/17
Contest: Random Acts Of Kindness
Sponsor: Debbie Guzzi
The Noose is tightening.
The 5’s and 10’s yanked from our hands and aching backs
Are spent on band-aids:
A last stand effort to plug the holes in our hearts
When the price of drowning is only getting higher
So we turn to tiny acts of thievery
Taxes prettied up, cashiers uncorrected,
Stealing at the edges because we’re backed into corners,
Corners
Glittering with promises corners
Dripping with possibility,
With Island resort wallpaper
Sold in bulk at Wal-Mart for
Profit: A trail of crumbs called America-
Which has curdled our souls and we love it!
And hate it and gossip about it and think obsessively about it and then
We find the most expensive friends our looks can afford,
Shopping for substance (50% off)
Staring through the eye of a screen
Light speed in pursuit of heaven on earth (Ignore the plastic)-
Until pop!
We die of ADHD.
Never having had the chance to smell the genetically modified roses.
Never having had the chance to see through this kingdom of ideas
As we served out our sentence to life in cubicle.
Jacob Reinhardt
10/24/2013
Supermarket celebration
shoppers are cytoplasm searching
for cellulose, muscle, photosynthesis.
Oils, petrochemical and vegetable
love: faith and trust
for instance, the Food and Drug Administration.
In America, the custom is
to avoid meeting the other shoppers' eyes. We graze
like cows or wander as zombies to the oldies played over the aisles.
I've always liked it here.
Cornucopia, yes. Also
a place to be alone and depressed, or cool off.
Water and bone
and the known ingredients. Neurons
for remembering, calculating, touching stuff.
I have a favorite bagger
who has the smile of a lover,
wouldn't rather be elsewhere.
Like glamour stars in bikinis
(but unlike tomatoes and bananas)
cashiers and clerks are admired from afar.
Joe says What's not to like? Ice cream, yogurt,
profit, tofu.
To eat your fill is a blasphemy against God.
Have a million dollar bill in my hot little hands
When I present it to cashiers, they poop in their pants
A promotional gimmick
But ever so realistic
When they threaten to call police, I'm gone in a glance
© Jack Ellison 2015
Small town grocery stores nowadays are very rare indeed,
But in simpler times they supplied a family's every need.
As a Hoosier lad, I worked in Mr L B Owen's Grocery Store,
In charge of absolutely nothing, but was given every rotten chore!
Poor Mr Owens was prone to go into a very ballistic state,
At the least of my many blunders - he could really get irate!
If I caused a crash of his neat display of vegetable soup,
He'd scream, "Stack it again, you incompetent nincompoop!"
It was a social club where neighbors met each Saturday night.
Men in overalls, women in calico - what a varied sight!
Ladies bartered with shrewd Mr Owens their eggs and butter,
While seeking bargains midst the narrow aisles and clutter!
Ah, but the sights, sounds and smells will e'er remain with me;
The squeaky floor, the odor of onions, the fresh ground coffee,
The butcher wielding his cleaver, slicing orders to please,
Barrels of dill pickles, colorful fruits and wheels of cheese!
There wasn't a PA system blaring, "Cleanup needed on aisle four!"
Nor surly, gum-chewing cashiers - he would've shown them the door!
Even in my stumbling, bumbling way I tried to be of service,
But I suspect my feeble efforts made Mr Owens, very, very nervous!
Robert L. Hinshaw, CMSgt, USAF, Retired
© All Rights Reserved
I reckon I've seen about everything in my nigh four-score years.
Obnoxious teens, obnoxious elders and unpleasant Wall-Mart cashiers,
And those baggy pants with the crotch nearly reaching to the knees,
But folks with a cell phone in their ear compare to none of these!
Some people sport spiked hair dyed orange, red or green.
Others with rings piercing their lips - a weird sight to be seen!
Gorgeous ladies flaunt tacky tattoos that seem mighty *****.
Plus all of that, they have a cell phone glued to the ear!
Vexatious ringtones on some cellular phones cause me to cringe,
'Specially if in a fine bistro or church my serenity they impinge!
The "William Tell Overture" in a concert is mighty fine to hear,
But please spare me that tinny tune from the cell phone in your ear!
Some use their cell phones while driving - to all others oblivious,
Never minding that such inattention could be very injurious!
Seems to me 'twould be tricky trying to concentrate and steer,
With that consarned cellular phone sticking in the ear!
Cell phones are an improvement in communications, I suppose,
With their music, cameras, computers and a dial that glows.
But, alas, for future generations I often wonder and fear:
Will babes be born with a cell phone protruding from the ear?
Entry for Simon Rogerson's "Let's Explore Digital Technology" Contest
(13 Feb 22)