Best Baptist Church Poems
Ballad of the Happy Valley Baptist ChurchAccordin' to my totally unbiased and very detailed research,
Jerimiah Flood pastored the Happy Valley Baptist Church.
From the pulpit he flailed his arms as if fightin' a hive of bees,
Elicitin' "Hallelujahs" and bringin' sinners fallin' to their knees!
His boomin' voice disturbed the peace of those...
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Categories:
baptist church, humorous, religion,
Form:
Rhyme
A Living Legacy: the Berean Baptist Church 157th Anniversarythe land was valued at $240, where they built "the little church on the hill"
established by a group of abolitionists and free blacks for they knew that was God's will
they named it Berean Baptist and its congregation was integrated
but after only a short time the...
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Categories:
baptist church, anniversary, black african american,
Form:
Ode
True Vine Baptist ChurchIt was a good day, a Sunday going to church day.
The sun was a brilliant glow.
The weather was agreeable, a welcoming change from the brutally brisk weather we been having.
True...
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Categories:
baptist church, dedication,
Form:
Narrative
Westboro Baptist Church Member At a FuneralWestboro Baptist Church Member At A Funeral
By Elton Camp
A sign he held and tee shirt wore
Same as he went to funerals before
Mourners gathered around the grave
To him, some outraged looks gave
While they were dressed all in black
He had “God Hates You” front & back
The...
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Categories:
baptist church, humor,
Form:
Rhyme
Westboro Baptist Church HonoredWestboro Baptist Church Honored
By Elton Camp
National Unity Today Society awarded a prize
For the greatest service in refuting public lies
“Westboro Baptist has pulled the veil away,
The cause of all mankind’s ills to betray.”
Or so that worthy Society has decreed
As it issued a trophy & wished godspeed
Engraved...
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Categories:
baptist church, satire,
Form:
Rhyme
Westboro Baptist Church Pickets Pine TreesWestboro Baptist Church Pickets Pine Trees
By Elton Camp
The reverend and flock are at it again
Pine trees they condemn for gross sin
All that yellow pollen got their attention
Its horrid perversion they had to mention
Pine trees have parts, both male and female
A fact that makes the righteous...
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Categories:
baptist church, satire, tree, tree,
Form:
Rhyme
The Westboro Baptist ChurchThe Westboro Baptist Church
By Elton Camp
(A note of explanation: This is written of a church that
makes a practice of picketing funerals of soldiers and
gay people. It is meant as a rebuke to the group (especially
to its “pastor”) and as a...
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Categories:
baptist church, religionmay,
Form:
Rhyme
Westboro Baptist Church To Picket At Sandy HookWestboro Baptist Church to Picket at Sandy Hook
By Elton Camp
“Westboro will picket Sandy Hook Elementary School to sing praise to God for the glory of his work in executing his judgment,” Shirley Phelps-Roper tweeted on Dec. 15.
Westboro Baptist Church is at it again
Praising their god...
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Categories:
baptist church, hate, religion, god, bible,
Form:
Rhyme
Westboro Baptist Church Praises God For Hurricane SandyWestboro Baptist Church Praises God for Hurricane Sandy
By Elton Camp
For dozens killed and damage of 55 billion
Westboro Church says, “God, thanks a million.”
“Thank God for righteous judgment,” one said
This was the daughter of the congregation head
So God sent the whirlwind on hapless Delaware
Because they legalized...
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Categories:
baptist church, religion, god, god,
Form:
Rhyme
Westboro Baptist Church UpheldWestboro Baptist Church Upheld
By Elton Camp
The Supreme Court says they have the right
To demonstrate, to yell, to spew hate and spite
True Christians are identified by showing love
Something this church seems to be devoid of
Even those who view homosexuality as a wrong
Are tired of Westboro...
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Categories:
baptist church, religion
Form:
Rhyme
Tornado Strikes Westboro Baptist ChurchTornado Strikes Westboro Baptist Church
By Elton Camp
The weather report look especially dire
The good reverend kept preaching fire
The congregation took in every word
“God destroyed Joplin,” they heard
“So, 125 people deserved what they got
Now they’re screaming in a place so hot.
“To put a stop to fags they...
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Categories:
baptist church, satire,
Form:
Rhyme