Best Astrophel Poems
A Parody of Sir Philip Sidney's Sonnet 31 from Astrophel and Stella
With wobbly steps, O Youth, thou climb'st the stairs!
How clumsily and with how red a face!
What! Dost thou trip and fall about the place
and pray thy folks sleep soundly, unawares?
Perhaps thy little brother who now sees
thee fall can be persuaded not to race
and broadcast to the house thy plunge from grace.
Thou could'st bribe him with money and say "PLEASE!"
Whil'st thou cling to the handrail, bleary-eyed,
now in thy shameful state, O Youth, pray tell
are friends thou partied with, like thee, unwell—
in fear, lest their condition be descried?
Those youth who guzzle beer in lieu of milk
will bring ignominy on all their ilk.
May 9, 2015
I wait for the flapping sound of wings
Come for me, sacred falcon of ancient kings!
With penetrating eyes it examines all who calls
A worthy soul if it sees, upon them it swiftly falls
Unhesitating talons sink into grateful flesh and bone
Tired blood spills and returns the earth an ancient loan
Dead weight is lifted, carried ever higher, but
They cannot enter the lofty realms of desire
What was made of dirt must return to the earth;
The falcon raises its head and strikes at my chest
It seems to ask me, “Are you ready to be bled?”
Skin is pierced, bones are cracked; my heart is opened
(Am I dead?)
Blood-red rose wrought on the cage of my ribs
The falcon strikes again, it bits and it spits
It digs deeper, fiercely it seeks a treasure
It`s torture, it`s pain - dark twins of pleasure
My heart is torn, suddenly the falcon shrieks
As a shiny pearl in its beak it reveals
This, my essence, it keeps, the rest must fall
The pearl is my life, my spirit, my all
The falcon keeps climbing to an immeasurable height
Starlight greets us; there`s silence there and might
The pearl is released, quietly it glows
And its lonely light back onto the earth it throws