Clyde went to London to get the best hat.
His note to his wife was swept under a mat.
He was missing for a week, but not a day more.
He came home by train, arrived a quarter ‘til four.
Behatted by the best of them
Clyde was astonished when Old Jim
Told him “beheaded” is what he’d heard.
His funeral was held on the twenty-third.
Attended by his wife and four exes.
Some were mad and gave him hexes.
Child support was now a debt of the past.
Clyde ‘got out of town in a plane, high class.
He bought a ranch, a home, horse, and cow.
Spending money would be much easier now.
Met a lovely lady named Fertile Gwen
Making child support payments once again.