Going through a closet,
I was quite surprised to find
Several shopping bags of t-shirts
That my son had left behind.
While looking at them, one by one,
I realized they portrayed
His entire growing up, through college,
Starting in first grade.
The school shirts featured P.S. 6,
Then Wagner Junior High,
With a special few from Stuyvesant,
Where high school years flew by.
Another group had characters
From movies or TV –
Pee Wee Herman, Austin Powers
And the Simpsons’ family tree.
There was Beavis, there was Butthead
And the South Park kids, as well
As World Series shirts and Yankees;
(We’re New Yorkers, you can tell).
Favor shirts from his Bar Mitzvah
Nestled near the travel trove –
Shirts from Scotland and from Israel,
Plus some places where we drove.
Then the final category,
From his favorite billiards hall,
Where the hours spent resulted
In those plaques upon his wall.
As a grown-up and a parent,
His collection’s surely grown,
But I love these sweet reminders
Of his younger self I’ve known.
South Park and
Dragon tales.
Twin peaks and
Seinfeld.
Family guy and
The Daily Show.
Ace of Base and
Cheryl Crow.
Friends and
Will and Grace.
Babylon 5
and spaced.
The X-files and
The West Wing.
Fancy and
Shania Twain.
King of the hill
And Mad TV.
Sponge Bob and
Ren and Stimpy.
Frasier and
The King of Queens.
Boogie nights and
MR. Bean.
Spawn and
Blue's Clues.
Goodfellas and
Dazed and confused.
TMNT and
3rd rock from the sun.
In living color and
Brooks and Dunn.
Jackie Brown and
Wayne's World.
Beastie Boys and
Don't take the girl.
***** as folk and
Beavis and Butthead.
The Simpsons and
Father Ted.
Lil Kim and
The Sopranos.
Selena and
Hey Arnold.
Reservoir Dogs and
Johnny Bravo.
Clueless and
You oughta know.
Turbo1904 ?
When my friend and I finally got chicks, they decided to leave us.
My friend's name is Butt-Head and my name is Beavis.
I thought that I was pregnant even though I'm a boy.
Because Butt-head and I are stupid, people get annoyed.
I become the Great Cornholio when I eat too much sugar.
I'm actually a mental case who eats his own boogers.
When Butt-Head and I meet chicks, we're sure to sexually harass.
And if you have a teenage daughter, you'll end up kicking my ass.
If you meet us face to face, we're sure to cause great anxiety.
We are both juvenile delinquents who are threats to society.
Don't come near us or you'll get so mad that you'll cuss.
You will be happy and better off if you stay away from us.
(Inspired by the hit cartoon that was created by Mike Judge.)