Barm Poems | Examples


Talent Stifled

Middle aged man in Docs, 
vintage leather jacket and
grey haired pubes around his cock.
Ill fitting tour shirts rekindling a hazy past.
Barrowlands, The Bunnymen. Hammersmith Odeon,The Clash.
U2 at University pre Bono crawling up his own ****.
Danced and hugged on stage with Terry Hall,
arrested for d&d outside Bradfords Great Hall,
after watching John Cooper Clarke supporting The Fall. 
Life reinvigorated by the post punk explosion,
no longer searching the NME gig guide,
but a Spotify recommendation. 
or an even sadder email notification.
A pre gig meal opposed to a walk home pie in a barm.
Ear buds for the tinnitus and Bisoprolol to keep calm.
Heartbreak to watch the talent unrewarded,
by a government devoid of a cultural foresight.
Stifled  opportunities 
through Tory Brexit lies,
Allowing the corporations of Cowles and the EMI’s to
reap million upon million,
leaving the grassroots unnurtured, venues struggling to stay open. 
Our greatest export,
an industry broken.
Categories: barm, depression,
Form: Prose Poetry

Premium MemberWhat's In a Name

English is a widely used language
wherever you travel, it's found
So isn't it just a little ironic
that we English go mess it around.
The alley between rows of houses round here
is commonly known as a 'gitty'
but elsewhere a 'snicket', 'twitchel' or 'wynd'
and yet they're all the same, mores the pity.
A bread roll's a' bap' or a 'stottie'
a 'bun' or a 'nudger' or 'barm'
so why can't they call it a 'cob' like we do
surely that will not cause any harm.
The toilet's a 'Netty' or 'throne room',
a 'cludgie' or down here, 'the bog'
so to save any further confusion why not
just go do it outside like a dog.
To learn different words and new cultures
they say that you must travel far,
but if you live here in the United Kingdom
don't panic- just stay right where you are.
Categories: barm, humor, words,
Form: Rhyme


An Opulent Donut Wears a Suit

Opulence is not flatulence especially in a house. And onion peel is very useful for persuading a plant to float in a prism. It is often great to watch a pea boat sail past. Rather remarkable it is. Round swirling orb. The balancing of a metre thick rug is amicable when on a trapeze. Akin to turning around on a very high roller coaster. But when travelling does one not partake in crusts of buttered lava bread. Booming bongos bringing baking beads. And so tread carefully. And lightly. When mixing physical currants,raisins and particles of icing across the skyways. Skyways are often very interesting for the patterns arriving are never exact. Good. Great isn't it? Sunrises tell of faith in a sunflower. And thrice times a weapon is twenty times a sea urchin. Basking. Knead or need? Savour that in a barm. Belligerent barbershop breaks beakers. 1 2 3 4 huckleberry fin at a disco. And a fig dancing around to the tune of a saxophone played by a fat prawn with very googly eyes, buck teeth, and a stripey hat. Hum. Xxxxx humanitarian z plagioclase p and a custard donut assortment. Z
Categories: barm, bible,
Form: I do not know?

Methionyglutaminylarginyltyrosylglutamyl Ok Good

When a dog becomes an alcoholic it is time for the owls to rise on a buttered barm of consciousness.hmmmmmm well interesting but five times round a chicken net is obliviously equivalent to a sawdust hat. Hahahaha xx and now fashionably arrange a filthy feather. In silvery gold. Woo Woo woo xx hoe a grass salad .....!% opinionated CCC %£¥€¥ *** and if course the............mmooooooooooooooomoooooo ...and how distinguished is a bow tie.....*** wow...swoosh with a dramatic whoosh and whoops a whoopsie cushion whooping...hahahaha and now go eat a trailer hahahaha I am a massively multiplayer of flowered breads on beanstalks hahahaha talk isn't a cave nor an apartment xxxxMethionylglutaminylarginyltyrosylglutamyl x z c v b in a cafe chatting how very very very very exciting..    wow xxxxxxx ha xx xx xx number xxxxxx
Categories: barm, computer,
Form: I do not know?

Turkey Farm

you hear there sound
walk up and down
inand around 
some city and town
they fly  to sky
out of the barm
on there
om the
TURKEY FARM
Categories: barm, adventure, bird,
Form: Light Verse


I Am a Displaced Scouser

I am a displaced Scouser,
Who comes from Bootle way,
And no matter where I go,
A Scouser will I stay.

I eat my chips on Butties,
Or perhaps upon a barm,
I get by on old Scouse wit,
And on my Liverpool charm.

But I’ve never owned a tracksuit,
It’s simply not my style,
And I’m not a football maniac,
Or have a police file.

So remember that you can’t believe,
All that people say,
About us lowly Scousers,
Who come from Bootle way.
Categories: barm, funny, people, places,
Form: Rhyme
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