Advert Poems | Examples


Nothing

'Nothing works faster'
the advertisement read
'Nothing works better'
the adman said
I don't know about you
but if that's true
it's Nothing for me
Nothing's a keeper
not only that
it's also cheaper

Cunning Contractor

In The Adverts the lines were catchy
But buildings of a glamour patchy,
Behind The Grand Pictures Cliff Builder:
Husband of Contract-Catching Hilda…

Smart-Eyed Hilda gets Forty Percent;
He’s Satisfied with Sixty Percent;
For one year, he won’t be buying her Gold:
No halting at spots the stuff is sold;
Once in a while restaurants not seedy,
Avoiding pubs run by The Greedy;
So that he might save; Who knows When next?
Times there were he never got A Text!
But he had Treasured Trust sadly sold,
Contracts to grab from only The Old:
Before one knows it one’s firms just fold….

Through and through: Poor Quality Jobs;
God Knows Cliff Morgan Shall, at last, Sob!


If I Wrote a Carlsberg Advert

Bill: They call me Bill.

Me: Then call you Bill I will
but I will not I will Bill
and I will not I will not I will Bill, Bill.

Bill: Don't call me.

Me: I will not.

Bill: No, don't call me.

Me: Okay I will. 

Bill: So you will not call me?

Me: I will, I will not call you.

Bill: God give me will.

Me: I'm Will I am, not the Will I Am.

Bill: William?

Me: Yes but they call me Will.

Bill: They should call you mentally ill!

Me: That hurts how I feel Bill!

Bill: Will will you f**k off!

Me: I will Bill, I said I will not but I will, I'll f**k I will, I will not I will Bill!!

Bill: (That Will is bonkers).

Me: (That Bill is stupid).



.........now if that doesnt make sense to you, you're stupid,
if it does, you're bonkers, 
but genius.........Bonkers genius.....Probably.............. 
Carlsberg tastes like sewage,
but if it didn't, 
we probably wouldn't give a sewage tubes innards!!




*Trust me, it makes sense (except the sewage tubes innards bit, that's just nonsense)... Probably.....

Advert 90260003

this is propaganda [eggs]
this is your brain on propaganda [frying eggs]
any questions? 
if you have any questions please provide your feedback 
at www.bbiswatchingu.com

Premium Member Sexy Advert Enticing Husbands

Come in, come in, how is your night, 
We have something you can’t resist,
Inside we can feed your cardinal need, 
We can satisfy your primalist wish,

Just see the Madame, on the way through, 
Then we’ll deliver a drink to your seat,
And we’ll perform on a pole, forgetting it all, 
Even things that the minister preached,

Then we’ll smile at you, suggest a small dance, 
And you can take us away to a room,
And there you’ll relax, while we’re gentle with you, 
As we gracefully remove our costume,

Then the night will be over, and you’ll walk out the door, 
With the biggest grin covering your face,
And when you get home, you’ll lay by your bride, 
Falling asleep in a sexy embrace.


Advert Your Rage, My Dear

Silence shattered, like your mother's 
favorite China, with a voice that 
is equivalent to a sonic boom.

No one's ever told you that your temper 
could cause such unrest, like the tides
against the adjusting position of Earth.

At first, they resisted, just like I did;
but then the barriers broke and the ocean
began to pour down my cheeks,

salty tears and sandy beaches.
Baby, don't you know that 
I'm just as fragile as glass?

Dear , your thunderclap bellow is 
enough to splinter this heart of mine;
and dear, I am weak.

Be gentle with your winds,
and quiet in your soul when the storms 
rage on. I will always keep you dry.

Advert For the Father-Land

By Fatmir Terziu

What could I tell a Londoner about the Fatherland? The adverts
Are copies of the unscrupulous inscriptions in tombstones,
Just as we are copies of the bestial goods,
Of our egoistic laughable thoughts,
Like fortune-telling using broken coffee-cups
which contain pieces of the phantasmagoric fates of our fear,
The yellow pages of history.
What could I draw to the attention of a Londoner, 
The early flight of the sleeping thoughts,
I pity the forgotten contemplation,
I fear the future views,
The never-formed ideas stir my soul,
Six hundred years have I been drinking from the sea of thought.
I shrink in spirit, shy away from walking the streets,
Hide amongst the whispers,
The adverts of the land, adverts for the Father-land,
Advice about unbrushed teeth,
Instructions about uncut nails,
Adverts for baby nappies, adverts for Mercedes,
Adverts for slimming pills, packets for slimming belts,
What could I say about the Fatherland to a Londoner...

Logistics - a Parody of a Certain Delivery Company's Television Advert, To the Tune That's Amore

Yes we don’t give a toss,
If your package is lost,
That’s logistics,
If it’s broken or bent,
Or has multiple dents,
That’s logistics,
If it’s fragile and breaks,
It was not our mistake,
That’s logistics,
Well you were not at home,
So we sent it to Rome,
That’s logistics!

So incredibly late,
That it’s gone out of date,
That’s logistics,
We don’t know where it went,
Are you sure it was sent?
That’s logistics,
Your parcels we’ll stash,
But we’ll still take your cash,
That’s logistics,
What an item on time?!
Oh no wait, it’s not mine,
That’s logistics!

Premium Member A Living Advert

She
show-cased
stage pieces-
upon a grand 
scale

Renee Lalique (1860-1945) commemorated Sarah Bernhardt in  bronze medallion .She modelled
(advertised) many of his pieces in her stage-act.

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