You are Safe now Dear

Trying to remind myself that I'm safe knowing I'm on the verge of crashing traumatic events forced upon my space terrorist threats identity fraud blinding pain I try and focus on positive things you know I safe place triggers invade my thinking I'm being bullied because identity thieves attempting to extort my American poetry corrupt officers niece resulting from my wearing wires pregnant for the FBI buying weapons and drugs from junk sick cops because Ciro Gargano torched 9 persons alive with my abusive ex husband trauma of a car bomb igniting my skull my life was in grave danger several attempts as I'm in a safe place and yet the killers arrived two decades later the anniversary of the murder meant for me intimidating me over my American poetry my brain hurt my chest hurt I cannot stop panting I hate my PTSD and anxiety disorder the worse because of the uncontrollable panic attacks i am totally isolating again I wish I never met Ciro Gargano I never would have witnessed terror and cursed myself with wearing wires pregnant for the FBI sometimes I hear there voices just saying it's going to be okay funny right i fear having another nervous break down what a blessed so many troops were helping me cope asking me if I served in the gulf war because of my illness my head is throbbing from the traumatic headaches brought on by my anxiety reliving domestic violence I have to take my medicine and try to stay relaxed talk therapy keeps me focused writing poetry helps me relive trauma calmly kind of like writing in my journal which thieves broke in and ripped pages wow I feel so broken fragile not a good feeling it's frightening you are safe now dear truly I am safe now I feel safe now