You are Safe now Dear

Trying to remind myself that I'm safe 
knowing I'm on the verge of crashing 
traumatic events forced upon my space 
terrorist threats identity fraud blinding 
pain I try and focus on positive things 
you know I safe place triggers invade 
my thinking I'm being bullied because 
identity thieves attempting to extort 
my American poetry corrupt officers 
niece resulting from my wearing wires 
pregnant for the FBI buying weapons 
and drugs from junk sick cops because 
Ciro Gargano torched 9 persons alive
with my abusive ex husband trauma
of a car bomb igniting my skull 
my life was in grave danger several 
attempts as I'm in a safe place and 
yet the killers arrived two decades 
later the anniversary of the murder 
meant for me intimidating me over 
my American poetry my brain hurt 
my chest hurt I cannot stop panting 
I hate my PTSD and anxiety disorder 
the worse because of the uncontrollable 
panic attacks i am totally isolating again 
I wish I never met Ciro Gargano I never 
would have witnessed terror and cursed 
myself with wearing wires pregnant 
for the FBI sometimes I hear there 
voices just saying it's going to be okay
funny right i fear having another 
nervous break down what a blessed 
so many troops were helping me 
cope asking me if I served in the 
gulf war because of my illness 
my head is throbbing from 
the traumatic headaches brought 
on by my anxiety reliving domestic 
violence I have to take 
my medicine and try to stay relaxed
talk therapy keeps me focused writing 
poetry helps me relive trauma calmly 
kind of like writing in my journal 
which thieves broke in and ripped 
pages wow I feel so broken fragile 
not a good feeling it's frightening
you are safe now dear truly
I am safe now I feel safe now

Written by Mrs Yolanda Joy Nicholsen
Copyright © | Year Posted 2024

Poem

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Dietrich Avatar
July 7, 2024 at 8:08 PM
My goodness this is so horrendous if it happened to you. I am in awe of people who survive such atrocities
Nicholsen Avatar
July 8, 2024 at 6:07 AM
Thank you for your kindness and compassion many blessings have a wonderful day
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