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Worst Love Poem Ever Written

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I suck at dying poems Chemo poems, Metastatic Cancer poems, Hair falling out in the shower poems And I told a half truth When I told you I could write you one In less than six months (It's been eight) I apologize for being so late I wanted your poem to be pink and graceful Like those ribbons I see all over the internet Filled with cheesy generic rhymes That could get me hired by Hallmark I just know my metaphors will start melting And that my similes will get all soft I guarantee you the rhyme meter will be off I went to Google And the typed in the word 'happy' Three billion things came up Not a single inference to Breast cancer, hair loss No redirects to mastectomies The only thing research could teach me Is that a good day on chemo Is when your stool doesn't come out tar Black And has no blood in it Or when your urine Smells better on Wednesday Than it did on Tuesday Sleeping less than 12 hours When 24 would be better Still I refuse to finish this poem Without something bright and hopeful And I know I'm doing a horrible job America has more poets Than it does alcoholics And Pot smokers combined And you chose me to be Your Breast Cancer Poet Laureate Trusting me to write a poem About the biggest battle in your life And don't think I didn't notice your Facebook activity Had decreased by 88% In the last three months And you aren't really Coming to any more of my poetry shows Ever again. Are you?? But we still have January, February And how do you write A Breast Cancer poem With no references to breast (I get embarrassed) That would be some kind of Oxymoron I guess But even if you had one breast Or no breast or if you had less hair than I do I promise to look only in your eyes And never ever even notice Or even think about it And never for a moment Would I feel sorry for you Yes I suck at lying too... But I don't suck at loving you Or at hoping you wake up tomorrow morning With no Cancer at all And that The Eiffel Tower will be right outside Your bedroom window... And I would be right there with you Holding your hand while we look down on Paris And you can impress me with your French again And if I ever make it To the Pulitzer Poetry board I might lose a thousand points Just for this poem alone And my hopes for the prize will be smitten And some old person with white hair will say That this was the worst love poem ever written

Copyright © | Year Posted 2016




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Date: 1/6/2020 9:56:00 PM
Tremendously inspiring, methinks. Clever, crafty --- yet strictly all heart and soul. Love it. Best wishes, Gershon
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Date: 1/3/2020 8:22:00 PM
Two agendas; written into one, Worst poem written - mate; you're just so wrong . . . : )
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Date: 12/12/2016 7:23:00 PM
Dear M.E. This was clever, funny, poignant and so entertaining! If they give a Pulitzer prize for 'Great Bad Poetry', this will be in the running. Lol! I really enjoyed it and hope that whomever prompted this poem becomes a survivor! God Bless, Betty
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Date: 12/12/2016 7:10:00 PM
Next poem... a table. :P I loved it, catchy and fun!
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Date: 5/14/2016 10:56:00 PM
Enjoyed the reading.
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Ellis Avatar
Michael Ellis
Date: 5/14/2016 10:58:00 PM
Thank You so much Tim Smith..Your words will strengthen me for such a poetic battle
Date: 2/2/2016 3:16:00 AM
I've enjoyed reading your poems.. =`)thanks much for sharing us your talent.. and this is brilliant!!!well-deserved!~Olive Eloisa =`)
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Michael Ellis
Date: 2/2/2016 6:36:00 PM
Thank you so so much Olive..I will read your work in a few minutes..I am so glad poetry can bring so many of us together
Date: 1/29/2016 8:32:00 PM
Congratulations hug great potd
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Date: 1/29/2016 8:10:00 PM
Congratulations on POTD!
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Date: 1/29/2016 1:31:00 PM
Love the humor and honesty here...congrats on being featured.
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Date: 1/29/2016 6:57:00 AM
Honest, Heart Warming and well worth waiting for message of caring and love.
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Date: 1/29/2016 5:26:00 AM
- A really wonderful poem, M.e. :) - Congratulations on your p.o.t.d. !!! - Happy weekend - hugs // Anne-Lise :)
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Date: 1/28/2016 3:16:00 PM
what a wonderful/heart wrenching poem. One of the best Ive ever read I think...This is going to my favorites and thank you ...I hope whomever you love that is suffering will turn out ok..Barbara
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Date: 1/28/2016 12:26:00 PM
Love and love of life live together with hope.I tried to imagine 2 similar poems.It is difficult like looking the sun.Eyes fill with tears...
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