Will You Tie My Shoes When I Grow Old

You were beautiful, 
my tiny child, 
wrapped tightly in my arms, 
close to my heart.
I listened to you breathing.
I counted your fingers
and your toes.
Helpless, 
you cried out to me
and I loved you
with every ounce of my soul.

Will you hear me
when I cry out? 
Will you hold me close
as I held you then? 

I remember the day
You took your first step.
There was no stopping you.
Your feet gave you freedom
to explore the world
like never before
but danger lurked.
I opened those doors anyway, 
cautiously, 
and introduced
you to the world.
Where will you be
when my legs
no longer run? 
no longer work? 
Will you realize
that I love
freedom too? 

I laugh
about that day
you first tied your shoe.
We tried and tried
to get that rabbit
in that hole
and you finally did it.
You pointed your toes
for everyone to see
how proud you were.

I am proud too, 
of my writing
and my drawing, 
of my needlework
and my cooking.
But my hands are beginning to ache
and my fingers will not bend.
I will lose the things
that make me proud
except for you.
Hopefully not you.
Will you let me
brag on you? 
Even tell wild stories
that are a bit beyond the truth? 
Will you be proud of me too? 

I waved good-bye
that morning when you left
on that large, yellow bus.
I was so scared.
I know you were too.
You waved at me bravely
through the dusty window
but I saw the water
forming in your eyes.
You came home, however, 
full of pride and joy.
You sang the alphabet song
and got most of it right.
You practiced for hours
until you could sing it
even in your sleep.

But 
I'm afraid.
I forgot
whether I took
my pills today or not.
I forgot
if I told this story before.
I even forgot once
who you were
and it terrified me.
My mind
is my treasure
the only thing I have left, 
and I heard you make
fun of me
for not remembering
that I gave you the
same gift as last year.
Will you love me
when I no longer
know who I am? 

You came home blushing
from the glow of
your first kiss.
Your first love, 
the one you thought was real.
You talked about him non-stop.
You changed for him. You gave.
But he left you anyway
for a blue-eyed girl
and I held you
while you cried for him.

I too have a
broken heart.
The love of my life
left me after
fifty-six years.
He left me here
to live life on my own
while he moved on
to another realm
And I cry for him too.
I long for his shoulder
and strong embrace.
I feel betrayed
because he and I
made a deal
that we would never
leave the other alone.
Yet I am alone
sitting in an echoing house
with no hands to hold.

You welcomed her home today- 
your tiny baby girl.
She has your eyes
and possibly your toes.
I see you counting them
as they roll me
into the room.
You finally came
to visit.
It has been a while.

You look up at me
with tears in your eyes
and ask
almost desperately, 

"Will she tie my
shoes
when I get old? "
Copyright © | Year Posted 2013

Poem

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Pate Avatar
August 8, 2024 at 4:55 AM
Excellent writing. Getting old sucks. Luckily my daughter took me in after my husband passed away. She has been so good to me. I couldn’t ask for better or more. I haven’t forgotten her yet and I fear for the day I might. My writing has slowed as well as my Painting. My mind was always my best feature, and I feel it slipping away. A brain tumor earlier this year was removed and it has helped. You don’t realize how hard it is on the elderly, Until you are one. Thank you for sharing your thoughts.
AGARWAL Avatar
March 4, 2024 at 7:48 AM
SO AMAZING.. NEW HERE GIVE MY POEMS A SHORT:)
Narain Avatar
August 26, 2023 at 11:03 AM
Beautiful poem. The question always remains. In Indian subcontinent, any one younger in family will do it, here I don't know who will.
Kaur Avatar
August 25, 2023 at 1:36 AM
God.. It is one of the most beautiful poems I have had the chance to read.
Ray Avatar
April 8, 2022 at 1:41 PM
i carry with me in life a great love for mother....and you have written the ode in my heart i carry...thank you
Gauthier Avatar
June 14, 2021 at 3:50 PM
O Rachel, what a beautiful and poignant poem of pure love. A FAVE for me ~
De Beaulieu Avatar
February 21, 2019 at 2:31 PM
Hello Rachel Kovacs, a beautiful created poem. i enjoyed to read. Have a nice day my friend.
Romios Avatar
February 19, 2019 at 10:23 AM
Hi Rachel, have never read a poem that tore my heart right out of my chest and wept. you are a master poet to me. This is beyond the horizon of beauty. Thank you for touching my my inner most being. You are magic.! I am blessed with a daughter who while a human, is a true angel, as I age. Her helping me and endless love, is a wonder. As she was to me. God's gift! With respect and love, Panagoita Romios
Bankson Avatar
January 25, 2019 at 12:56 AM
No words and that's odd..Brillant and breathe taking
Coulstock Avatar
July 19, 2018 at 12:38 AM
Sorry Rachel I forgot I had already added it to my favourites-old age and short term memory loss I’m afraid-But I hadn’t expressed my admiration before for this wonderful piece which is something you deserve.
Coulstock Avatar
July 19, 2018 at 12:26 AM
This is really wonderful.It is so moving and beautifully written.It was such a joy to read I would like to have it please Rachel for one of my favourites.
Omer Avatar
March 8, 2018 at 11:32 PM
We give our children everything that we can, to see them growing up to be what we couldn't, to have the happiness that we didn't have, to be speared from the mistakes we fall in to. I hope your child will grow up to be the person you wished to be. Great words you wrote, I can tell they came out from good heart.
Dickenson Avatar
January 11, 2018 at 11:07 PM
Came across this poem as I’m getting ready to sleep. Ah, the memories of raising tiny tots ~ though related, not my own ~ I am well-pleased to have shared their “firsts”. Thank you for articulating so well the thoughts that come as many of us lay our heads upon our pillows. I am now a follower and will enjoy reading more of your poems. ~ BD
Rowe Avatar
December 13, 2017 at 6:52 PM
Very heart felt poem. Thank you for sharing your talent: From Peggy
Goff Avatar
December 11, 2017 at 4:33 AM
Wow...amazing poem, Rachel...I care full time for my 88yr. young Mom now....3 strokes, new heart valve, etc...living independant! the biggest thing I catch myself...is showing frustration with her building memory issues...I want her to remember such simple things....but need huge patience...am working on my shortcomings, thanks for daylight on issue...james
Inman Avatar
December 11, 2017 at 4:20 AM
Rachel, a touchingly beautiful write that left a tear spilling from my eye.
S     Avatar
December 11, 2017 at 3:49 AM
This was absolutely beautiful Rachel!!! So poignant yet filled with love! I was swept away with recognition into emotions that every parent can relate to. I’m very happy your piece was featured so that I have discovered you today:). Best , Judy
Smith Avatar
December 11, 2017 at 12:33 AM
Very good work. Linear projection through anecdotal material every parent can identify with to a conclusion we are forced to dwell upon. Refreshing to be confronted with such talent.
Marcum Wong Avatar
December 11, 2017 at 12:09 AM
Rachel, I think this is a really beautiful poem with a message that should be shared. Outstanding! A Fave for me! : )
Kemp Avatar
December 10, 2017 at 11:57 PM
I Am A Fan!!! That poem is amazing! 10/10 that's awesome I have to say on of the best poems out there
Imtiaz Avatar
December 10, 2017 at 11:13 PM
Hi Rachel....So lovely poem....and a lovely request to the child.................Love to Mom and DAD when they grew old and we normally ignore them.... ""Will she tie my shoes when I get old? "
Zaidi Avatar
December 10, 2017 at 9:20 PM
Dear Rachel Kovacs, Simply splendid poem,depicting the reality! But it's said that 'love begets love & hatred begets hatred'. If we'll take care of our parents & their needs,our progeny is supposed to follow suit. On the contrary,if we'll ignore our parents, then our children shall forget us also.
Konos Avatar
December 10, 2017 at 6:08 PM
Certainly makes you wonder leaving much food for thought! Thank You I found it most enjoyable
Kendrick Avatar
December 10, 2017 at 5:49 PM
Rachel, This speaks of facts that most will face in their lifetime..You have captured the emotion of life so well..I am at the point in my life where anything can happen and I do not know if my children will be able to care for me and that is a scary thought..Sara
Buck Avatar
December 10, 2017 at 5:25 PM
Rachel: You have put into elegant words that "elephant" in every grey hairs lonely room. Thank you for sharing this with all of us on the soup. Perhaps it will catch the eye of someone's son or daughter and awaken in them a desire to visit. oldbuck
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