Will I Find You in the End

Hello God, are you there? I’ve been searching for you everywhere. Starting out in my mother’s womb Not very long ago, When my life was barely beginning Before I began to know… Anything about you And this world I was headed toward. I was looking for you even then, Perhaps so even more. More than when I finally arrived, The apple of my parents’ eyes Crawling ‘round the grass and grounds You placed down here for me, When all I knew was sky is blue And love was wild and free. And as I grew tall and learned to run I looked for you in shade and sun. In churches, bibles, liturgies And things I could and could not see Like ocean waves and winds that scatter, Poetry, symmetry and thoughts that matter. And this idea of independence And freedom from tyranny, The pursuit of happiness, truth and justice And the bounties that they bring. And other things we take for granted Like cats, dogs, frogs and birds, Rivers flowing, flowers growing And every song and kind of music played and heard. While I never gave up and never let down My search for You through cities and towns. From tiny islands in the old gulf stream To highlands and by lands From Mount Olympus to New Orleans. And continued my search with purpose and worth In libraries filled with books Of countless pages throughout the ages How others thought you might look. And if you are real, you know how I feel About the majesty of Your creation. Planets, stars and the universe writ large, Consciousness, curiosity and causation. From the first thinking man who was able to plan His future among all things, While looking for You just as I do In places where he once lived and dreamed… Down in the bogs and bayous Where cypress trees grow tall, And on the moon and Mars and in honky-tonk bars And leaves turning colors in the fall. And in the hearts and minds of others And the catchlight in their eyes, Hoping I might find you there, In their laughter and their hope-filled cries. Even now I’m still seeking and wondering If you can hear my plea within, I pray dear God if we’re not at odds: Will I find You in the end? © Terrell Martin, 01/29/2025