Why I Don't Write Sonnets

To begin with, I underestimated the undertaking. A sonnet may look easy, but in fact it’s complicated – if written strictly by the book. Fourteen lines of rhymed iambics composed of three four-line stanzas with a couplet tacked at the end, on my skill imposed more work than I cared to give a sonnet. Well, never one to labor needlessly, I thought I’d start with seven lines, you see – to ease the stress. It then came to me, why not limit seven lines to only three? Yet, for a first try, three lines seemed a lot, better faster and easier with only two, which is exactly what I proceeded to do. But even as I was determined to start, a single line seemed a better strategy. Sound reasoning that, and expedient, too; and if expedient is what I wanted to be, half a line was a dream come true! I then took a break to have a drink – to rest my brain and give it space to think. Beer seemed weak; I needed something stronger, whose effect was quicker and lasted longer. Well, it worked, though the alcohol’s effect didn’t help a bit, regretting my ambition did not conform to the book’s definition so I deleted the entire @!##$ project!