Whistler's Husband
Here's another story that might be true
Or at least that's what I've been told
Don't tell my wife I told you this
Or I just won't live to grow old
It happened about twenty-nine years ago
Well, give or take a day
Now listen close to this story I'll tell
For it happened just this way
I met this girl back in nineteen-eighty
She was as fine as she could be
Well, I just couldn't stop checking her out
And she was looking back at me
I asked her for a date, and she said, "Sure"
So I took her to the picture show
We were sitting pretty close, while sharing a coke
When they turned those lights down low
In the pitch black dark my ears begin to ring
I heard a whistle that was loud and clear
So I told my date that I'll be right back
As my finger finally found my ear
I crammed that thing in knuckles deep
When I noticed that the whistle was gone
'Til I sit back down and the whistle came back
And that's when I started to yawn
So that's when it hit me like a ton of bricks
"This chicks got a hearing aid"
'Cause everytime that I'd lean away
That whistle would start to fade
Well, I thought I should be a gentleman
So that's when I started to (YELL)
I scared the girl nearly half to death
And out of the seat she fell
She said, "What's wrong with you, are you crazy?
I said, "I DIDN'T KNOW YOU COULDN'T HEAR"
She said, "Please stop screaming at the top of your voice,
Can't you see that I'm standing right here?"
Well, that's how it happened when I met my wife
And that's how this story goes
She had a real bad cold that night we met
And the whistle was coming from her nose
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