Where Were You Daddy

Where Were You Daddy where were you when I was all alone why weren't you here after I begged you to come home how could you leave me here with her, you were all I had I had enough people to hurt me I needed my dad you promised you'll always be here to pick me up when I'll fall you told me if I ever needed anything, all I had to do was call I must have called you a million times each day I just needed to hear your voice I needed to know you were okay but you didn't even answer, you didn't even say good-bye I guess you were too drunk to remember about me or maybe you were just too high I needed you, Daddy, I needed you to love me more but you weren't thinking about me when you walked out that door into the bars dad you can see my permanent scars always and forever is what you always say will i have to wait my whole life to ever see that day it's sad that you did what you told me any other guy would if my own dad couldn't love me I don't see how any guy could I'm disappointed in you because you left me here with no one even now you have apologized for everything you've done you say I should forgive you, and dad i want you to know that i have but just remember this... who stuck by you right or wrong, wasn't it me? just like the typical guy you couldn't love me or appreciate the things I did I don't even know who you are anymore you're not the man I looked up to as a kid I want him back, I want my dad!! don't you see? nothing else mattered, you were all I really ever had you were the only one who put me first before everything else we were a team, Dad how could you leave me here by myself? since the first day you left, there's been this space I've so desperately trying to fill no one understands anymore and these cuts are the only way I numb the pain I feel I found a way to fill the space, but it's only temporary they can't erase the pain I've been through you said I'll always be your baby Dad, what did I do?! These boys can't take the insecurities you caused no matter what they do or say you were supposed to be here, Daddy, to take the hurt away I just want everything to be like it was before you decided it was easier to leave, before you forgot all the things you promised, before your drugs meant more to you than me, I just wish this would all stop, I wish I could make it all okay I can't forget all those years ago I still blame myself, I should've made you stay but you should have known better I would never have wanted you to go you were my protector, Daddy you weren't supposed to hurt me; you were suppose to be my hero but you did hurt me, Dad, and you can't take it back it'll never be the same I've become so insecure but you're not the only one to blame even now you realize you were wrong and come home tonight it's done so much damage trying to fill that space nothing you do will ever make it right dad i love you always and a day ill still listen to what you have to say i have learnt so much while you've been gone and as you know a lot of it is thanks to mom but i'm willing to start a new but dad my decision only depends on you!