Notes About The Poem

Premiere Contest WinnerWhen I No Longer Love You

When dawn's blush of light eclipses the moon
And afternoons find meadows sprinkled with dew
When I view willows smiling instead of weeping
And the keeping of promises is no longer a prize
When artist's eyes see only hues of sepia and gray
And the Milky Way abandons its billions of stars

That is when I will say, "I no longer love you"
And my heart will perish in saddest adieu
                            ***

When my pen is lost, and my ink well runs dry
And the sky fills with clouds of yellow daffodils
When chills from the sun freezes over the seas
And bees create pollen and flowers make honey
When agony and love have been clearly defined
And my mind does not hold you in each thought

That is when my heart will no longer love you
And life will have no meaning in a world askew
                           ***

When songbirds stop singing in harmonic trills
And heathered hills have lost their sweet scent
When fermented grapes become a bitter wine
And the shine in my eyes dulls when I see you
When a view of sunset does not leave me awed
And God turns his face from a repentant sinner

That is when I will say I don't love you any more
And oceans waves of blue will no longer rush ashore
                          ***


2022 Poetry Marathon Mile 25 Contest
Sponsored by Mark Toney

July 25, 2017  ~ Romantic Contest Write
Sponsored by John Hamilton
Copyright © | Year Posted 2017

Poem

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Dietrich Avatar
August 18, 2026 at 5:01 PM
Congrats on a well deserved trophy win. 👏
Beaufort Avatar
August 13, 2026 at 8:33 AM
Hi Lin, this thought provoking poem makes me think that you have a very powerful sense of dedication when it comes to an emotion like love. How lucky the person who is the attention of this love really is! Of course, this is for a contest and may not be in your heart, but the writing of such contrasts from normal reality should inspire us all who have the capability to love. Sending a big smile!!
Lane Avatar
August 13, 2026 at 9:35 AM
I was completely dedicated to this love at one time. Lost him, or I should say he lost me when he proved not to be the man I married. It was written for a contest, and he no longer holds a place in my heart, but all is as it should be. Thank you for your tender concern. I'm honored that you appreciated the contrasts I tried fervently to portray.
Kauffman Avatar
February 3, 2023 at 1:07 PM
What a lovely love song, Lin. Your poems always burst with the images of beauty in nature that so eloquently express your poem. Congratulations on your win! Blessings of beauty to you!
Lane Avatar
February 4, 2023 at 8:00 AM
Thank you for your gracious comments, Sam. I always appreciate your thoughts.
Mcintosh Avatar
January 29, 2023 at 1:33 AM
This is simply beautiful and awe inspiring. I love it so. Congrats on the huge win. God bless you friend. Love, Gina
Lane Avatar
January 29, 2023 at 9:07 AM
Thank you very much for appreciating my poetry, Gina.
Ashley Avatar
January 28, 2023 at 5:59 PM
Dear Lin, your magnificent, mighty pen spills emotive metaphors and romantic imagery upon the grateful poetic page with breathtaking, passionate abandon. I'm awestruck by phrases like "When I view willows smiling instead of weeping" and "And the sky fills with clouds of yellow daffodils" and "And God turns his face from a repentant sinner". I swoon under the influence of your exquisite artistry, my friend. Congratulations for your excellent trophy win in marathon mile 25! Warmest wishes.. ~Susan
Lane Avatar
January 29, 2023 at 9:06 AM
Dear Susan, you are such a gracious lady, exceptional poet, and write some of the most beautifully phrased comments of anyone on this site. You go into such depth that allows the author to feel that he/she has accomplished something very worthy of being recognized. You are a jewel among poets here, and since I'm not overly fond of diamonds, I'll compare you to a sapphire, bright, sparkling and with great intensity of color. Thank you for your continual kind words on my poetry.
Watt Avatar
January 28, 2023 at 2:49 PM
Exquisite crafting, Lin. Love the use of irony and contrast, with so many brilliant images of events that could never happen to underscore the permanence of committed love. Too many to mention here, but I particularly enjoyed "willows smiling instead of weeping" and "bees create pollen and flowers make honey", building to the climactic statement of awe for creation and God's forgiveness of repentant sinners. Love how each line ending is echoed with a rhyme early in the next line. A fave, to be returned to and enjoyed over and over. Well worthy of your trophy win, heartfelt congrats! John
Lane Avatar
January 28, 2023 at 2:52 PM
I always know that your comments will humble me, John. Coming from you, each one has great value to me for I know you never state things you don't sincerely feel. Originally written for John Hamilton, this instantly became one of my favorite creations, and I'm delighted that you honor it with your kind thoughts. Thank you so very much.
Toney Avatar
January 28, 2023 at 2:36 PM
Lin, I applaud your brilliant use of vivid hyperbole in this outstanding poem! This is the first Romanticism poem that has placed in the Poetry Marathon. A Fav Poem for me. Congratulations on your first-place TROPHY finish on Mile 25 of my 2022 Poetry Marathon. There is only one more Poetry Marathon mile to run before the Qualifier's Final Placement Contest! More information about the Qualifier's Final Placement Contest will be given at the Mile 26 checkpoint.
Lane Avatar
January 28, 2023 at 2:49 PM
Mark, thank you for finding this one to your liking well enough to fave it. I appreciate the trophy placement for my romantic lines.
Mhangwa Avatar
August 18, 2017 at 7:58 AM
This is one of the most beautiful, vivid and rich poems I have come across in the whole life! Lin, you masterfully make every single word your own! Well done! Congrats on winning the contest
Lane Avatar
August 18, 2017 at 8:01 AM
I thank you for the many kind compliments you've given this poem, Kudzai. I appreciate each one of them.
Mccall Avatar
August 1, 2017 at 9:23 AM
What a heartwarming and wonderfully romantic poem it is absolutely beautiful Lin definitely a fav and congratulations on first place well deserved.
Lane Avatar
August 1, 2017 at 9:25 AM
How very kind are your thoughts, Edward. Most appreciated, as well. Thank you, dear sir.
Lamoureux Avatar
August 1, 2017 at 8:57 AM
I'm glad I followed the trophy! Exceptional writing Lin.
Lane Avatar
August 1, 2017 at 9:01 AM
And I'm delighted to see you, Rick. Your lovely comments are a trophy to me. Thank you so very much.
Barden Avatar
July 29, 2017 at 5:15 PM
Wonderfully charming and exquisite write, Lin - I so love your writing! This one made my heart glow, and I'm fav-ing it! Congrats, Dear Friend! <3
Lane Avatar
July 29, 2017 at 9:35 PM
I'm so appreciative of your many accolades, Greg. Thank you so very much.
Kimathi Avatar
July 28, 2017 at 4:36 AM
What an amazing work! Congrats Lin, for your well-deserved first placement in the contest! ;-)
Lane Avatar
July 29, 2017 at 5:47 AM
Thanks ever so much for your well wishes, Teddy.
Rodrigues Avatar
July 27, 2017 at 3:24 PM
A real beauty! Congrats on your win!
Lane Avatar
July 27, 2017 at 6:18 PM
Thanks very much, Kim.
Marcum Wong Avatar
July 27, 2017 at 2:40 PM
This deserves the honor of First placement Lin! Big Congratulations on your wonderful win! : )
Lane Avatar
July 27, 2017 at 6:18 PM
Thank you so much for such a sweet comment, Connie.
Allison Avatar
July 27, 2017 at 11:09 AM
Well Lin I told you in a soup mail this would top the charts - you are incredibly gifted in both poetry and art - please let me know when you paint a pic like this:-) hugs jan xx
Lane Avatar
July 27, 2017 at 11:34 AM
Yes, you did, Jan, and I'm honored with John's choice as well as your compliments. I certainly will send you a photo when this one is painted. I've several promised ahead of it.
Wood Avatar
July 27, 2017 at 11:04 AM
Beautifully written Lin. Congratulations on your win! - Dean
Lane Avatar
July 27, 2017 at 11:32 AM
Thank you very much, Dean. I appreciate the comments.
Nusker Avatar
July 27, 2017 at 9:47 AM
Like a lovely love song, beautifully written. Congrats on your first place win, Lin.
Lane Avatar
July 27, 2017 at 9:56 AM
Sweet sentiments, Afzal, and very appreciated. Thanks.
Hamilton Avatar
July 27, 2017 at 9:11 AM
Wonderful write Lin, amazing use of contrasts things that cannot happen, like God turning away a repentant sinner, that sealed it for me, congrats on a very difficult contest to judge, very worthy number 1.
Lane Avatar
July 27, 2017 at 9:55 AM
The difficulty you had in judging this contest makes me appreciate the honor even more, John. Thank you so very much for seeing it worthy.
Manassian Avatar
July 26, 2017 at 1:51 AM
Beautiful, Lin....the most convincing part of this whole lovely piece is "when God turns his face from a repentant sinner"...that phrase really solidified the strength of the love written of here, its lasting nature, for surely God would never do that. Great analogy
Lane Avatar
July 27, 2017 at 9:54 AM
You're so right, Eileen. God's forgiveness has no bounds as long as he knows we are sincerely sorry. Thanks for reading and giving kind comments.
Bocsa Avatar
July 25, 2017 at 3:04 PM
Please love me again. I cannot live without love. Where love is not, nothing is and I remain in the desert of nobody .
Lane Avatar
July 25, 2017 at 3:07 PM
The deepest love, as in my poem, has no need to be renewed. It's never ending. Thank you for commenting.
Allison Avatar
July 25, 2017 at 12:10 PM
Your poem brought tears to my eyes Lin - your lines are beautiful but sad and the image is wonderful - is it one of your amazing pictures? I have never attempted this form and love the structure of the repeated words.Hugs Jan xx
Lane Avatar
July 25, 2017 at 3:05 PM
Jan, you're such a soft-hearted lady. Thank you for the sweet remarks, noticing the intermittent rhyme form, and for your tears. The painting is not mine, but it's certainly my style. I think one day I'll paint something similar. Hugs.
Marcum Wong Avatar
July 25, 2017 at 12:03 PM
An outstanding array of lovely imagery in this well written poem Lin! Beautiful! : )
Lane Avatar
July 25, 2017 at 3:03 PM
Many thanks to you for the compliments, Connie.
Smith Avatar
July 25, 2017 at 11:37 AM
That will be a sad day but I don't think it will happen...very beautiful Lin
Lane Avatar
July 25, 2017 at 3:02 PM
This is the kind of love I'd wish for everyone...thanks so much, Tim.
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