When He Left
when someone leaves
it is so loud
so personal
so silent
a deafening emptiness
with a middle ear
only you can hear
you
are
not coming back
you
are
never
coming back
I have to know that
right
so
there will never be
an indefinite
you and me
Three AM's
are the worst
left aching for peace
you remember I said
when time goes to sleep
the in-between time
when moments cease
when tomorrow
gave up yesterday
still
I miss
the fragrance of your pleasure
a voice that satisfies
the melody of a tender string
that did not know
it was holding
together
a life
that would never be
but
your vibrations
are all around still
velvet passionate
silver raindrops
they linger
knowing
me
finding
me
I know
you rarely think of we
you moved up and I moved around
still you
a most beautiful drug
now a humiliating habit
now
I creep
for a stranger
not to worry they said
social media
is not a danger
profile up
smile for the camera
cry into the wine
hurry you don’t have much time
I was
a victim of a monster
and now
the monster to a victim
feeling hysterical
in a smiling room
of misery
hoping he
will provide
the ultimate release
from the last shot
that
crippled me
but still
I clutch
the jagged edges
needing to survive
the nights
when there are no
safe ledges
doesn’t have to be quality
just a momentary
remembrance
that satisfies
the pain
just so I might cry
with some dignity
when I stand lonely
in the rain
please just find the trace
the touch
he left all over hours of me
I am lost in a pirouette
far off away into his source
wondering
where is this place
that lost love goes
if love never dies
I would want to visit there
and apologize
so
what happens
to the lover
who is not ready
to walk alone
Copyright © Gabrielle Jordan | Year Posted 2018
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