Unprecedented Life - Chapter 2 - a Nod of Approval

I’ve let everyone down to be exact… I am a proven-guilty fact (a false fact) Optimism and pessimism sure have its arms around me at all times I wish I had a black and white checkered pirate ship of my own sometimes I over-complicate things too many times I’m growing weary of those nursery rhymes They don’t mean a thing to me anymore I’ve lost hope – maybe, doubt just rummaged through me Because I feel it…I feel my Holy Spirit get pruned… I was once that ripe grape until sin got me bruised… I shouldn’t have done that… What have I done? Why did I act like a son-of-a-gun… All for what? Naught? I suppose so since you just smile away the pain I see it in your eyes everyday..that’s why you sink in your dismay I am sorry that I hurt you so… Really, I mean it… You haven’t a clue, oh no… That I am way more legit Than what meets the eyes… I am for His truth, no lies… I can’t recall happy-go-lucky childhood Because all I can think of is missing you…but it won’t do me any good To weep these vile tears… That are bottled up with fears… Cultivate me with Your humbling spirit… I had enough of it…the fight, the urge, the lust, the gist of it I don’t mind if you leave out the door Because I feel abandoned as it is… I guess you don’t love me anymore… Is that what I think it is? Tears!? Again…I’m such a failure sometimes… “I’m here with you always,” Jesus said to me with open arms “Just believe and you’ll have unprecedented life – the Kingdom of God…” I whisper solemnly, “The Lord is my Shepherd…I shall not want…” “You have done good, my son, now doubt no more…I know you’ve been led astray, but weep not…have faith, hope, joy, compassion, and last, but not least, love,” He kissed my forehead before he left the scene… That vision made me have ambition all over again Thank you, God I approve and nod I know I’ve done well in my journey, but why have You taken everyone and everything from me? In my mind’s eye, it says: Don’t blame Him for your wrongs and actions…you snooze, you lose – don’t whimper like a baby…what goes around comes back around I accept it…without a peep of a sound… All along, all alone…hopelessly gravity-bound Give me a reason to move forward… I feel that my life has gone backward… I am so awkward in my sufferings, so heal me right this instant – who says He can’t? I can’t be going on this road of Gullible Street – that isn’t neat! I work super hard on a daily basis, believe me, like a meek, genuine and prudent ant I feel my feet take a seat on this Couch of Incomplete…I feel the heat… The inspiration, the frustration is obsolete…what now? I thought I was renewed by His one and only Spirit? Somehow, I’ve lost track of time in my life of Show-me-how I’m caught in the middle of Satan’s flames of I’m-through-with-it Exit out of me, spiteful, horrifying and vain thing called lust… Why must you cling on to me so? Deleting you is a major Must Excellence is in Your name It goes without saying – You aren’t lame My gut feeling says so as well You are absolutely swell as hell I am the lame and the foolish one I should be ashamed for making me this numb, insolent and irresponsible boy I’m so pathetic – maybe a little too insecure… Okay, maybe I’m a little too hard on myself, but You get what I mean Not every field is a perfect color of green…I’ve seen the unseen… Planting seeds of hope in my mind for once in my life, I’ve found a cure to end this pain of insanity – 1.) Don’t worry about a thing 2.) Believe and you’ll receive His fruit from on high 3.) Think positive thoughts, no matter what 4.) Thrive for an unprecedented life always and forever Amen.