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Unfinished -

As
the hands
of time tick
away, the golden
days become nights, leaves turn saffron, and I
see the stars flickering light vanishes -
the dream to be
with you has
moved too
far. 

Yet, 
my love
is alive, 
rich, and ardent  
as ever as when you and I first found 
each other’s soul united that one night 
the silky green 
leaf still clings
to the
tree. 

Is
it just
remembrance 
when the leaf sways
with the wind as it hangs from the strong tree -
Is it just a shining star's memory 
I am feeling
this fervent
teeming
flame. 

-maria
10.21.14

Copyright © | Year Posted 2014




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Date: 11/10/2014 7:37:00 AM
Well done, Hija! I know this form, but have not used it for writing. You have made very good use of it. The content is excellent...so are the finishing touches! // paul
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hija de la luna
Date: 11/10/2014 7:42:00 AM
thanks, Paul, for the lovely words and the visit!
Date: 10/29/2014 12:51:00 AM
wow, this is so like my own feelings for someone in the past and many of my poems have this same theme. I LOVE this one, hija!!!
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de la luna Avatar
hija de la luna
Date: 10/29/2014 7:41:00 AM
oh that's so nice, Andrea! nice to share the very same feelings with you through this piece. am so glad you loved it!
Date: 10/29/2014 12:51:00 AM
a seven!
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de la luna Avatar
hija de la luna
Date: 10/29/2014 7:42:00 AM
feels so wonderful to be rated highly by you, Andrea!
Date: 10/28/2014 5:20:00 PM
I love this, you are a great poet. I am going to fav this add it to my collection.
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de la luna Avatar
hija de la luna
Date: 10/29/2014 7:36:00 AM
oh that's sweet, Maurice. that warms my heart :))
Date: 10/23/2014 10:55:00 AM
Hija this is simply beautiful i do love the form I have never seen it before:-) Hugs jan xxx
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hija de la luna
Date: 10/25/2014 7:12:00 AM
thank, Jan! hugs!
Date: 10/22/2014 3:17:00 PM
Looking forward to the finished article, and based on what I've read already, it'll be worth it - Hija, James :)
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de la luna Avatar
hija de la luna
Date: 10/23/2014 10:36:00 AM
added some lines, but it really is unfinished i guess. thanks, James for the kind words :)
Date: 10/21/2014 12:57:00 PM
I love what I see so far...let me know when you are done....hugs Tim
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de la luna Avatar
hija de la luna
Date: 10/23/2014 10:37:00 AM
think this will really be an unfinished piece
de la luna Avatar
hija de la luna
Date: 10/21/2014 4:33:00 PM
thanks, Tim! i will try to spill more if i can :)) you and Jan are darlings of this page..painting a smiling sun to my day..hugs back
ALLISON Avatar
JAN ALLISON
Date: 10/21/2014 12:58:00 PM
people will talk Tim we are commenting at the same time again! Hugs jan xxx
Date: 10/21/2014 12:57:00 PM
Oh Hija finish this it is beautiful:-) Hugs jan xxx
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hija de la luna
Date: 10/23/2014 10:40:00 AM
Jan, added some lines but seems i could not put closure to it. it is unfinished..thanks for the push :))
de la luna Avatar
hija de la luna
Date: 10/21/2014 4:29:00 PM
thanks, Jan! let's see :)) hugs back! you two are sweet :)) made me smile
ALLISON Avatar
JAN ALLISON
Date: 10/21/2014 1:06:00 PM
lol - Hugs Jan xxx
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Tim Smith
Date: 10/21/2014 1:04:00 PM
They already are..They are saying there go those two cuckoo birds...stand clear...hugs Tim