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Understepping Poem One

I look in your eyes and my heart breaks. How will I remove you from my mind? I would Never have imagined such pain. How will I Love with this broken heart. You have made me this shell of a man. I can not explain the way I feel I know I will never love again. Read first word first line Second word second line Third word third line Forth word fourth line Fifth word fifth line Sixth word sixth line Seventh word Seventh line Nine Sylables per line including understepping line I would like to call this form Understepping because of the underlying message stepping down with each line.. Here we have a poem within a poem.

Copyright © | Year Posted 2012




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Date: 12/28/2012 5:04:00 PM
ok, I GOT IT. Easier than I expected, and I really love the secret message of this.
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Richard Lamoureux
Date: 12/28/2012 7:04:00 PM
Thanks again Andrea, I look forward to your visits, you are so encouraging.
Date: 12/27/2012 11:56:00 PM
I love it Richard! The steps and the particular syllables- great. The idea of searching for a hidden meaning is clever because you wouldn't want to make it too obvious. And the name works too! And that it merges well with the whole poem is a huge plus. So it gets an overall great! It's wonderful to see a brilliant mind at work!
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Richard Lamoureux
Date: 12/28/2012 9:37:00 AM
You flatter me my dear. Thanks for making my day. I hope you give it a try.
Date: 12/27/2012 10:13:00 AM
tres bien!!!!
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Richard Lamoureux
Date: 12/27/2012 10:53:00 AM
thanks
Date: 12/27/2012 10:04:00 AM
the poem stand very well on it's own, seen some what a similar form before, where reading words across down, start and end, but not sure i've seen one stepped before, as i say good poem in it's own rights. the words that form the steps, could be the title of the poem?
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Richard Lamoureux
Date: 12/27/2012 10:53:00 AM
It started that way as the title but then you would lose the fun of finding the message that is imbedded.
Date: 12/26/2012 9:07:00 PM
Richard, A SAD AND DEEP FEEL... oh what love! we give and break... I like what you did here... i do not know if this is a form already.. I'd seen a poet do this one time, where they took a verse.. and then wrote a line for each word... you did yours perfect.... you should offer this to the soup...I like it... if I was a dare devil... I'd try one out myself.. maybe you should run a contest... and call it... "NINERS" lol...kidding...pd
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Richard Lamoureux
Date: 12/27/2012 8:27:00 AM
Thanks Linda I may do that.
Date: 12/26/2012 7:01:00 AM
Well written, Richard. - - Thank you for year 2012, many good poems and nice comments from you! - oxox / / Anne-Lise :)
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Richard Lamoureux
Date: 12/26/2012 7:51:00 AM
Thanks Anne Lise.
Date: 12/26/2012 5:23:00 AM
Richard this is very good and very creative the way that you play with diferent forms and possibilities with poetry. Well done - shaz
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Richard Lamoureux
Date: 12/26/2012 7:49:00 AM
Thanks Shaz, how was Christmas?
Date: 12/26/2012 4:10:00 AM
Wow, could it be free verse? It looks like it :D how are you Richard? Hopefully you are having a great Christmas yesterday :D -hug, Yanny
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Date: 12/25/2012 11:32:00 PM
Hello Richard, another great write my friemd. Rollo
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Richard Lamoureux
Date: 12/26/2012 7:49:00 AM
Thanks Rollo.
Date: 12/25/2012 8:14:00 PM
Excellent write....hopefully you can put claim to yet another new form? Merry Christmas, hope it was filled with love and blessings! Hugs
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Richard Lamoureux
Date: 12/26/2012 7:48:00 AM
Thanks, I just gave it a name.
Date: 12/25/2012 6:56:00 PM
Sorry can't help you with the form, I am no good at that. Love the way you have done it though
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Richard Lamoureux
Date: 12/25/2012 7:58:00 PM
This form came to me and I don't want to take credit if it already exists. Thanks for the positive feed back.

Book: Shattered Sighs