Twilight Hours

In the twilight hours I lie On my back face-up closed-eyes facing the sky I am clarity Not fully awake or asleep Free of prejudiced mind and sanity And my mind wanders Snippets of thoughts and assessments Judgements and decisions made Random thoughts tucked away Hurts never let out to play In the twilight I feel that pain When awake brain hid it ‘cause there was nothing to gain Here I'm feeling it raw, festering And I'm angry I can't let it go, it’s me it's poisoning There's no awake brain here No balm of calm to salve my wounds I feel the hateful venom rising Rising like the sun is rising It’s getting closer now my angry heart drumming It burns my skin and flatlines Disapparating into sleepy fog Dawn obliterates those thoughts On the first rays of sunshine cascading through my room In the twilight hours I lie Drifting through random thoughts, dreams Aspirations so true soo deeply hidden Here glowing they are blinding A supernova of hearts desires No awake brain here to say no Hopes’ soft whisper comforts, caresses Encouraging first gently, more urgent with every breath Write down, write them down I pen bleary-eyed Skew scripts of random words No sooner put to paper Are gone in an eruption of peace Deep sleep overcomes In the twilight hours I lie Less awake more asleep No words, no thoughts, no views No anger, no judgement, no dreams Hopes’ whispers silenced There's no peace here Ever-growing is a throbbing flame of passion As painful as it is beautiful All-consuming its’ searing heat all-encompassing Fuelled by the anger burning up Judgement already ashes on whirls of Thoughts and burnt leashes Dreams freed and Aspirations crowning Hope releasing sparks ever further It's a furnace and it has risen Demanding, suffocating, it howls its’ release I scribble words desperately Grasping tails of fire as they burn my fingers Still I hold on My charred hands nothing to the rising view, the phoenix flies For a moment I see everything It's clear and devastating and breathtakingly beautiful This time awake brain has seen it too Capturing all it could to relive this moment in wakeful hours As I tumble down into blissful slumber Time has passed Awake brain long since exhausted its captured fire Now in the twilight hours I lie More awake, less asleep Awake brain longs to explore those musings But all is quiet, serene All that's left is Hopes’ softest whisper That drifts away on the morning light ‘Keep going, Passions’ wings are only a locked dream away’