Today I missed life in silence, so quietly that no one noticed

Today I missed life in silence, so quietly that no one noticed, I woke up, but didn't truly arrive, brushed my teeth, got dressed, I watched the lives of strangers louder than mine, promising myself today would be different, But the day slipped through my fingers, just like before, leaving no visible traces. I lost it in my reflection, searching for something familiar, but finding only tired eyes, In the way I filled my day with tasks, but not with true or deep meanings, In the words I spoke, without really saying anything important or sincere. I lost it in conversations where words seemed repeated, Where laughter came out of habit, surrounded by people, yet feeling like a ghost, I lost it in the afternoon spent among books, work, distractions, and daydreams. My mind wandered between regret and nostalgia, thinking of roads not taken, Of parts of myself lost, dreams I let fade into the mist of time. I lost it in the ticking clock, in the muted hum of hours passing without me. Time moved forward, but I stayed in place, caught between yesterday and today, I lost it in the evening when the sky burned in colors I did not admire, When the wind carried the whispers of those truly living, while I remained behind my walls. I existed, but was not truly present, breathing, but not deeply enough to feel, I lost it without tears, without noise, without dramatic moments or breaking points, Just a silent ache settled within me, as if life whispered my name, but I hesitated. How many days have I missed like this, how many moments slipped unnoticed through my fingers, How many more will be wasted before I truly awaken, before life quietly fades away?