Notes About The Poem

I wrote this ghazal this morning.  I forgot how much I love this form of poetry.

For Sotto Poet's Ghazal contest.

There are different definitions for a Ghazal, and different interpretations of the from. Ghazal poetry is poetry of longing. Traditionally, the ghazal tended to focus on unattainable love, often illicit, or sometimes on metaphysical questions. But, today, the ghazal has broadened to touch many types of longing and loss. The ghazal is a form poem that uses the art of rhyme and repetition. As it is originally a Persian form and the Indian subcontinent, the refrain and rhyme can be lost when translated to English, as is the meter.

There are 18 syllables per line.

 

To feel evergreen


In my poetic garden, where petals breathe with light - I feel evergreen.
Among ruby roses I see butterflies take flight - I feel evergreen.

Roaming under the influence of jasmine and honeysuckle perfume,
Edenic whispers weave tales of passions that excite - I feel evergreen.

In the fragility of flowers I yearn for my gold orchid amore,
who's eyes like stars, guide me in the darkness of midnight - I feel evergreen.

In her sepal support embrace, I find peace resting upon her blossoms,
like a bee in her flowered nectar tasting delight - I feel evergreen.

Her tender satin skin enchants my senses into drunken breathless sighs,
in each kaleidoscopic floret her soul shines bright - I feel evergreen.

Just like the sapphire moon I bow to her delicate dahlia distinction,
my soul shines when her loving caress is like moonlight - I feel evergreen.

I ask the breeze to carry her to the realms of my tranquil oasis,
so I can dance in the glory of her serene sight - to feel evergreen.

I know greedy gardeners are envious of my most beautiful bloom,
but they do not know how to evolve her seeds upright - to feel evergreen.

Before the tests of time become my nemesis like the serpent with Eve,
flourish strong my beloved like the sun at daylight - to feel evergreen.

In the hope of an eternal vineyard where our sacred love never wilts,
I'll protect you like thorns against predators at night - to feel evergreen.

Forever remain within the boundaries where our hearts beat together,
a perennial symphony where twin flames ignite - to feel evergreen.
Copyright © | Year Posted 2024

Poem

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Kauffman Avatar
February 6, 2024 at 11:54 AM
Back with congratulations for your win, SO! The words of this poem are "evergreen" with a "symphony where twin flames ignite - to feel evergreen" with a sense of love's commitment. Just love the metaphor and your timeless images! Blessings!
Zahid Avatar
February 6, 2024 at 9:51 AM
Congratulations on your win, SO
Miller Avatar
February 6, 2024 at 2:54 AM
Great ghazal one, nice you followed the rhyme before the refrain rule, well done!
Beaufort Avatar
February 3, 2024 at 10:15 AM
A well composed garden does have a lot of love. My hope is that anything ever lost returns to you in ways as beautiful as you describe here. I have to read it again to appreciate all the images created.
Beaufort Avatar
February 3, 2024 at 10:15 AM
Particular love that you have a poetic garden. Wonderful!!
Hind Avatar
January 31, 2024 at 2:16 PM
Ah beautififul. I like poems about twin flames, soulmates, etc. "Feeling evergreen"- powerful diction throughout.
Roper Avatar
January 30, 2024 at 9:23 PM
Beautiful verse, so soothing with great flow.
White Avatar
January 30, 2024 at 6:20 PM
Beautiful and so deeply touching, to have a love that is your life source , a link untreatable and never ending SO. Kelli
Kauffman Avatar
January 30, 2024 at 1:22 PM
SO, this poem is a masterpiece of beautiful, romantic images with such subtle sensual overtones. It flows like a symphonic tone poem. I love the theme of "ever-green," a perfect metaphor for undying, eternal love. There is such depth in the word and impact of "evergreen." Best wishes for the contest. I think Lasaad will love this poem. Looking to find it at the top of the winners list! Blessings!
George Avatar
January 27, 2024 at 10:05 PM
What a wonderfully romantic poem breathing in the fervor of perennial love. You are a gardener tending one beautiful flower as the focus of your sole attention. "In the hope of an eternal vineyard where our sacred love never wilts, I'll protect you like thorns against predators at night - to feel evergreen". The sweet sensuousness of your poem makes it stand out. All the Best dear Silent One.
Baker Avatar
January 27, 2024 at 9:25 PM
I like the repeated ending to each line, Silent One. I don't remember reading a poem in this form before. Well-written, my friend. Your adjectives very enhancing and the poem read smoothly. Have a great weekend. Bill
Brotherton Avatar
January 27, 2024 at 5:54 PM
Just to be able to walk among your talented words gives me inspiration and encouragement, my friend. A beautiful poem, Silent One.
Buehler Avatar
January 27, 2024 at 3:24 PM
I delighted in the tour of your beautiful garden, Silent One. It's so rich with imagery and magic. This is a fave. :)
Situation Avatar
January 27, 2024 at 12:24 PM
Not so silent here. The influence of nature to produce this work is well worth it.
Andresen Avatar
January 27, 2024 at 11:57 AM
- I'm speechless with admiration ... gorgeous, my friend :) - hugs
Ashley Avatar
January 27, 2024 at 8:23 AM
Dear Silent One, your golden pen is ingenious! The phrase "I feel evergreen" is endlessly poetic, so symbolic, representing the physical and spiritual. Above and beyond your stunning phrase, the exquisite imagery of romance and passion is sensual and breathtaking. Gentle sprinkles of alliterations glimmer in your verse of love and your last line is a moving grand finale to a deep rich masterwork of poetry. Warmest wishes my inspiring friend.. ~Susan
Pandit Avatar
January 27, 2024 at 7:24 AM
Delightfully charming and enchanting poem, my friend.--Edenic whispers weave tales of passions that excite--indeed! Mesmerizing lines invoke excitement of romance in heartbeats that ignite desires. Excellent write as always, SO.
Empress Avatar
January 27, 2024 at 6:07 AM
Awwn this is so sweet and beautiful, i remember writing ghazal long time ago, was hard work for me but look at you do this effortlessly, im inspired: and yes you are evergreen, as you are the poetic gardener. And those greedy gardeners envious of her sepals and fragrance can keep on envying , i really love how romantic and beautiful and soothing this is, as im havin fever and not very well but your poem here calmed my soul and touched my soul! If only my beloved will write poems like this! So
Empress Avatar
January 27, 2024 at 6:09 AM
Impeccable, so moving so gorgeous! I especially love the lines “ Before the tests of time become my nemesis like the serpent with Eve, flourish strong my beloved like the sun at daylight - to feel evergreen.“ made me tear up really! Sigh! Such love! “ Forever remain within the boundaries where our hearts beat together,“ love that! Twin flame connection is so strong here how you’ve depicted! Pleasure reading this! Best of luck for the contest
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