Notes About The Poem

Having elderly parents I have lots of stories I could tell, but the perils of getting older hit me more and more as I see them deteriorate.

The Perils of Getting Old

I’m getting older - this fact I cannot deny Not quite ready for the scrap heap or to give up life and die My body isn’t quite the same; my boobies have gone south But I keep on smiling with gleaming dentures in my mouth Got a spare tyre round my middle now, I really need berating Get a bit more exercise - soon the tyre will be deflating My short-term memory is going I forget what I do or say My short-term memory is going I forget what I do or say I need to remember things I have forgotten since yesterday I rely on Tena ladies now in case I dribble pee Sneezing, coughing and laughing can cause a little wee My short-term memory is going I forget what I do or say My short-term memory is going I forget what I do or say I need to remember things I have forgotten since yesterday I have three pairs of glasses now as my eyesight is getting poor I forget where I have put them – then I find them on the floor My short-term memory is going I forget what I do or say My short-term memory is going I forget what I do or say I need to remember things I have forgotten since yesterday My hearing is it is going too, I don’t hear what you say I need to buy a hearing aid but I’m putting off that day My short-term memory is going I forget what I do or say My short-term memory is going I forget what I do or say I need to remember things I have forgotten since yesterday My once brown hair is going grey and now I’ve hit the dye I colour it quite regularly you can guess the reason why My short-term memory is going I forget what I do or say My short-term memory is going I forget what I do or say I need to remember things I have forgotten since yesterday My joints creak and ache and they really need a rub I must buy some more Radox and put it in my bath tub My short-term memory is going I forget what I do or say My short-term memory is going I forget what I do or say I need to remember things I have forgotten since yesterday 21st March 2014 Submitted to 101 in a row contest #5 sponsored by PD Linda:-) Written from observation and experience … but I’m not admitting to anything!!! NB: UK Spelling of TYRE has been used
Copyright © | Year Posted 2014

Poem

Post Comments

Poetrysoup is an environment of encouragement and growth so only provide specific positive comments that indicate what you appreciate about the poem. Negative comments will result your account being banned.

Please Login to post a comment

12
De Burca Avatar
July 19, 2016 at 6:23 PM
Thank you for your clever and very funny poem I enjoyed reading it today. Congrats on your win also
Allison Avatar
July 20, 2016 at 5:56 PM
Thanks Seosamh:-) hugs Jan xx
Eastman Avatar
July 18, 2016 at 10:29 AM
This is definitely soooo me... LOL... and soooo true... Loved it! Congratulations on the win!
Allison Avatar
July 20, 2016 at 5:56 PM
I'm not admitting which bits refer to me Carol lol:-) hugs Jan xx
Merryman Avatar
July 17, 2016 at 8:35 PM
Jan, this is so funny, but I know eventually it may be true. I hope it's a lot further down the road. Congrats on your win! Blessings!
Allison Avatar
July 18, 2016 at 3:40 AM
Thanks Kim:-):-) It was written only about 6 weeks after I joined the site - am so pleased its got greater exposure through the contest. I've read it a couple of times at open mike sessions and people have loved the humour:-) hugs jan xx
Devnath  Avatar
July 16, 2016 at 11:52 AM
Whatever you do there's no problem in your old age but don't forget to take care of your hubby. Lol, it's an excellent poem my lovely smiling friend drawn with your fantastic pen mixing colors of fun and reality both. A great congrats to you. A great 7. Loved always, bl
Allison Avatar
July 18, 2016 at 3:37 AM
Thanks so much BL:-) hugs jan xx
Richards Avatar
July 16, 2016 at 9:43 AM
If we cannot laugh about it, we may as well cry !! What a cute poem this is Jan! Congrats to you !!
Allison Avatar
July 16, 2016 at 10:55 AM
Thanks Carrie I was delighted to place so well I'd forgotten all about this poem she says firmly tongue in cheek:-):-) hugs Jan xx
Canerdy Avatar
July 16, 2016 at 7:49 AM
A 7 for this GREAT winning poem, Jan! Janice
Allison Avatar
July 16, 2016 at 10:54 AM
Thanks so much Janice:-) hugs Jan xx
Nair Avatar
July 16, 2016 at 2:17 AM
Hello, Jan, Big congrats! But some take comfort from the saying 'you are only as old as the woman you feel'.lol.
Allison Avatar
July 16, 2016 at 10:55 AM
LOL thanks :-):-):-) hugs Jan xx
A  Avatar
July 16, 2016 at 1:25 AM
Hey Jane, I see this was a past winning poem. Nice entry/awesome win. WUV **SKAT**
Allison Avatar
July 16, 2016 at 10:54 AM
Thanks so much Skat I am still smiling at the win in your contest:-):-) :-) hugs Jan xx
A   Avatar
July 16, 2016 at 1:03 AM
Jan, you put so much into this write, nice to see it again, Congratulations on your win. Stop by and enjoy my blog "The Perils of Getting Old" if you'd like. Always & Forever ~LINDA~
Allison Avatar
July 16, 2016 at 10:53 AM
I did a couple of tweaks to the original poem - great to be able to showcase this one again (I'd forgotten all about it she says tongue firmly in cheek lol) hugs jan xx
Horn Avatar
August 8, 2015 at 6:27 AM
Oh horrors I thought that peril was penis. Of course you understand that I am a 74 year old man almost married for 50 years who just completed his 1401st poem. Comparing first and last poems is very interesting. Don't you think. Anddd. I sent Kerry pictures of her uncle's name that was at Normandy. Jim Horn
Allison Avatar
July 16, 2016 at 10:52 AM
Thanks Jim:-) hugs Jan xx
Martin Avatar
May 20, 2015 at 11:32 AM
Quite an accurate and humorous picture of growing old! Unfortunately I am in the same boat with you!
Allison Avatar
May 20, 2015 at 11:52 AM
Thanks for dropping by one of my older writes Thomas - i do appreciate your support:-) Hugs Jan xx
Jones Avatar
April 18, 2015 at 6:04 PM
Jan, getting old is great. Isn't it? Excellent write you have here my friend. Well done. :O) Keep up with the great work. Keep on penning. Thank you so very much for sharing your wonderful and creative talents with us. We all truly appreciate it. *S* Cynthia
Allison Avatar
April 18, 2015 at 6:07 PM
Not so sure getting old is so good lol but if I live to a ripe old age like my mum and my health is ok then i won't complain - well I many but probably will have forgotten what I was complaining about lol:-) Hugs Jan xx
Yvonne Avatar
August 28, 2014 at 4:26 PM
this is excellent and very funny. i just don't see how it applies to me though.
Allison Avatar
April 18, 2015 at 6:06 PM
I have a feeling I have read this comment before... but i forgot to comment on it lol:-) Hugs jan xx
Yvonne Avatar
August 28, 2014 at 4:26 PM
this is excellent and very funny. i just don't see how it applies to me though.
Yvonne Avatar
August 28, 2014 at 5:15 PM
hahahaha!!!!
Allison Avatar
August 28, 2014 at 4:30 PM
Maurice I've got a feeling I have read this comment before - I am not sure where or when:-) hugs Jan xx
A   Avatar
May 31, 2014 at 8:05 AM
Thank you for the comment on my comment, glad you had fun writing this poem.. Linda
Allison Avatar
May 31, 2014 at 8:12 AM
Darren will be in touch!!!!!!!!
A   Avatar
May 29, 2014 at 6:16 PM
Hello Jan AGAIN, for this contest... heheh,, congrats,, on the win. XOX~ Linda
Allison Avatar
May 30, 2014 at 1:51 AM
Thanks Linda. I had fun writing this LOL. Have made it a favourite in case I forgot i wrote it! Hugs Jan xxxx
Haick Avatar
May 29, 2014 at 4:34 PM
Hilarious! Thoroughly enjoyed, Jan! Congratulations on a fine win! Thanks for reading mine! Love, Annalise
Allison Avatar
May 29, 2014 at 4:38 PM
was a really fun contest with lots of fantastic entries. Hugs Jan xxx
Gorelick Avatar
May 27, 2014 at 1:47 PM
Cant remember if I congratulated you or not.. Cant remember if I congratulated you or not.. HAHA. I think this is one of the best. BG
Allison Avatar
May 27, 2014 at 1:53 PM
LOL Thanks Barbara - I'll make it a favourite in case I forget I wrote it ! Hugs and thanks for the lovely comments. Jan xxx I collaborated with Darren Watson on another poem for the contest - we write as 'jadazzle united' you may enjoy that too. hugs Jan xxx
Callus Avatar
May 27, 2014 at 11:38 AM
This, and your other humorous writes are a bonus for my day! Much enjoyed:) Congrats on your fine win. // paul
Allison Avatar
May 27, 2014 at 12:11 PM
I do try to inject humour in to as many writes as possible Paul but the past few days have been so so tough for me but I'm through the worse and happy today. Hugs as ever Jan xxx
Mehta Avatar
May 27, 2014 at 5:57 AM
Congratulations on your fine win, Jan
Allison Avatar
May 27, 2014 at 12:09 PM
Thanks for the lovely comment Dr Mehta, Hugs jan xx
A  Avatar
May 26, 2014 at 8:46 PM
Jan, Congratulations, in Carolyn's "Birthday and Aging Humor" contest. Love ~SKAT~
Allison Avatar
May 27, 2014 at 1:34 AM
Thanks for dropping by Skat hugs Jan xx
Lindley Avatar
May 26, 2014 at 7:16 PM
Congrats on this fine write and great win!!!
Allison Avatar
May 27, 2014 at 1:34 AM
Thanks Robert its made me smile which is what I need hugs Jan xx
Devonshire Avatar
May 26, 2014 at 5:03 PM
Dear Jan, Enjoyed your poem. Portions of this poem are featured in the birthday booklet. Congratulations on your win and thanks for participating in a contest to wish some special ladies happy birthday. Love, Carolyn
Allison Avatar
May 26, 2014 at 5:24 PM
Thanks Carolyn I entered it never expecting to win as it was a long poem. I hope your lovely friends enjoy their birthday books it will be such fun reading it. Hugs as ever Jan xxx
Davis Avatar
April 27, 2014 at 12:23 PM
Jan HEY!!! Have you been stalking me and writing about it. Cause I have a LOT of the things on this list. LOL thank you for the great comment on my No Exit poem.
Allison Avatar
April 27, 2014 at 2:02 PM
I can't remember who it was written about Robin lol Hugs Jan x
A  Avatar
April 16, 2014 at 5:57 PM
HI JAN, Congratulations, enjoyed stopping by. Luv ~SKAT~
Allison Avatar
April 21, 2014 at 12:04 PM
Thanks for dropping by Skat. Hugs Jan x
12
Get a Premium Membership
Turn off ads, get more exposure for your poetry, and get more features with a Premium Membership.
Book: Diverse Voices: The Poetry of Human Rights and the Pursuit of Peace