The Other Kind of Pain

Give me a headache The fury of a migraine The pounding of temples The powder keg sensation Of explosion a minute away Give me a tummy ache The kind that makes you double up Fist pounding the bed Hands clutching sheets Retching into a bowl From the pain of knots And cramps Give me a back ache That leaves me immobile For fear of the searing pain That would accompany One wrong movement Pain shooting up my spine Without searing pain Shooting up my spine Deadened only by pain killers Give me any kind of physical pain I will bear it, I will survive I will live to see another day But spare me Oh spare me this pain This pain in my heart This heartache That is eating away at me Devouring my mind That is accusing That is demonizing And driving me insane This internal pain That has me in fetal position Rocking back and forth Crying out in shaking sobs Biting my inner lip so hard That blood mixes with my tears Just..just to feel something real Something to fool my mind Into believing The body is in need of aid Defense systems kicking into place Let my mind be fooled Let it forget The other pain That pain A pain that is quickly leading Massive heart failure of love …………………………………………. Death A state where there is No feeling No pain No joy No tomorrow Nothing… Give me…Oh please, please give me The other kind of pain. Eileen Manassian Ghali PS...please understand this is a literary piece of work that shows an exaggerated state in the mind of the writer...me. I don't mean to trivialize the pain of those who suffer from chronic pain of any sort. This is MY poem, and MY thoughts on the matter. THANK YOU!