The Other Kind of Pain
Give me a headache
The fury of a migraine
The pounding of temples
The powder keg sensation
Of explosion a minute away
Give me a tummy ache
The kind that makes you double up
Fist pounding the bed
Hands clutching sheets
Retching into a bowl
From the pain of knots
And cramps
Give me a back ache
That leaves me immobile
For fear of the searing pain
That would accompany
One wrong movement
Pain shooting up my spine
Without searing pain
Shooting up my spine
Deadened only by pain killers
Give me any kind of physical pain
I will bear it, I will survive
I will live to see another day
But spare me
Oh spare me this pain
This pain in my heart
This heartache
That is eating away at me
Devouring my mind
That is accusing
That is demonizing
And driving me insane
This internal pain
That has me in fetal position
Rocking back and forth
Crying out in shaking sobs
Biting my inner lip so hard
That blood mixes with my tears
Just..just to feel something real
Something to fool my mind
Into believing
The body is in need of aid
Defense systems kicking into place
Let my mind be fooled
Let it forget
The other pain
That pain
A pain that is quickly leading
Massive heart failure of love
………………………………………….
Death
A state where there is
No feeling
No pain
No joy
No tomorrow
Nothing…
Give me…Oh please, please give me
The other kind of pain.
Eileen Manassian Ghali
PS...please understand this is a literary piece of work that shows an exaggerated state in the mind of the writer...me. I don't mean to trivialize the pain of those who suffer from chronic pain of any sort. This is MY poem, and MY thoughts on the matter. THANK YOU!
Copyright © Eileen Manassian | Year Posted 2013
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