Gogster Dw Poet Free verse

The mask

I'm sitting here with lots to say
But silence most likely is the best way 
Thoughts so dark, even im scared 
A problem halved, but no problem shared

Lots of talk of darkness and light
A history thats filled with spite
Lighting and thunder is all its been
Feeling iv lived my life in sin

I've made mistakes, some I regret
Lies i told id rather forget
I'm older now and much wiser
For all she's done, I still can't despise her

Disassociated, trying to fight it
Darknesss can't win, I can't submit 
Losing track of days and nights
The fire within me i need to ignite

Sleep is now a thing of the past 
Nights so long, days so fast 
I don't know how much longer this will last

Iv always been a lover not a fighter
Iv had better days my life has been brighter 
Fiercely loyal, a push over though
Nobody knows I feel this low

I hide it well behind a smile
Showing the truth to the world is not my style
But maybe I need to let someone know 
This mask i wear is all for show

You see its easier to smile and hide
Then it is to admit your whole life was a lie
I wish she kept saying he was dead
The truth hurt more, the lie lives in my head

I don't know if I'm coming or going
Racked with fear of what is coming 
I think I just need to sleep 
My body aching, becoming weak

The mask i wear is slowly fading
The past in my head recreating 
Maybe tonight will be the night
That I'll be stronger and ill win the fight 

Good vs evil, lie verses truth
My inner child i need to soothe 
I cant forgive, I won't forget
I also can't keep being this upset

My mask has faded, it is no more
This is me now, but I wish you had known me before 
Full of love and full of life
Maybe ill be her again in time

But until then, this is me
My heart on my sleeve, no protection, I'm free
No mask in sight, feelings laid bare
Living my life on a whim and a prayer

A problem halved, but no problem shared
I realise now she never cared 
And though that hurts and breaks my heart
My life is mine, this is my restart

The mask is gone, this is me
Iv laid it out for the world to see
The battle is always darkness vs light
Iv let you know I hate who you see

You now know what its like to be me....

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