Rhona Mcferran Poet Shadorma

The Living Dead

Please don't wait
for me to feel it-
let's just start
from right here
awkward, numb and full of fear
it's now or never

Feeling dry
preserved, mummified
like something
long since dead
flickers of life in my head
haunting like a ghost

Trance-like walk
horror story style
down the aisle
children flee
mummy mumbles, blankly stares
heart and soul elsewhere

Still I try
to show up and care
God forgive
my dead soul!
Unfeelingly, I believe-
help my unbelief

__

Another Shadorma, with apologies to readers expecting a Halloween poem!  I found this tucked in my Bible from a Sunday a while back when I was depressed and not in a proper mind for worship.  While it's a bit embarrassing to admit I feel this ambivalent at times, I'm posting this hoping it will comfort others who struggle with this as well.

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M. L. Kiser November 6, 2019 at 3:17 PM There's only so much we can psychologically take; if not given the proper length of break from the stresses, we can end up in this condition. Wel penned with feeling. Rhona Mcferran November 6, 2019 at 9:52 PM Thank you! Yes, I'm trying to do a better job of dealing with stress before it gets to this level (again)...

Michelle Faulkner October 31, 2019 at 9:06 AM I have dealt with depression throughout my life, and this so well captures what it was like for me, this is so profound, Rhona- Rhona Mcferran October 31, 2019 at 4:19 PM Thank you for understanding! ;)

Caren Krutsinger October 30, 2019 at 10:08 AM The honesty and integrity of this one pulled my heartstrings. Rhona Mcferran October 31, 2019 at 12:44 AM Thank you, my Soul Sister!