Notes About The Poem

November 18, 2024


 

The Clash Of Sane And Bane

Beyond the hills, the storm,
oh, yellow queens they quake;
poor Autumn aspens feel
old weight of weakened leaves
the hostile winds will steal.

Beyond the hills the storm
it brews, like coffee black.
A bitter sky will fall
—dainty saintly sunlight 
a martyr for the squall…

Beyond the hills the storm,
My dreams in strobe-light flash.
Engage in shadow dance
the clash of sane and bane;
a silk and burr romance.

Beyond the hills the storm—
yes banshee gonna wail!
The gray steel rain a strafe
a suitor  six-shooter.
My tongue; a silent waif.
Copyright © | Year Posted 2024

Poem

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Kendrick Avatar
January 4, 2025 at 12:55 AM
If for a contest, Susan, it reads like a good contender to me. Way to go. Thanks for sharing it with us. Sara K
Ashley Avatar
January 4, 2025 at 7:44 AM
Dear Sara, this poem was written for the joy of writing and not for any particular contest. Thank you for sharing your thoughts and for your time spent with my verse. Warmest wishes.. ~Susan
Proxenos Avatar
December 16, 2024 at 6:06 AM
Hey my dearest friend - can sane and bane ever reconcile, no they can only clash - ' My dreams in strobe light flash, engage in shadow dance ......... a silk and burr romance -' You are an amazing poet, a true poet whose talented poems will be read for evermore. Susan my friend I wish you and your lovely family a blessed Christmas, thinking of you always from across the pond, will always remain a devoted friend and fan. Lot of love Jennifer.
Ashley Avatar
December 19, 2024 at 11:23 AM
Dearest Jennifer, my lovely soulful friend, I relish your beautiful response to my poem and your heartfelt Christmas wishes. Your precious thoughts of my poetry honor and humble me and your words of glad tidings bring me comfort and joy during this Christmas season. I hold you ever in my heart and mind, my sweet poetry sis. Wishing you and your beautiful family a very merry Christmas and a happy, healthy new year filled with inspiration, light and joy. Always your devoted friend and fan too :)) Lots of love and hugs.. ~Susan
Kauffman Avatar
December 10, 2024 at 11:11 AM
My Dearest Rhyme Time Friend! Once again I am hypnotized by the spell your words cast, drawn into "grey steel rain" and the power of your metamorphic storm in quaking "yellow queens," banshee wail and the ominous power of a coming storm! Such amazing, visceral images sweet poetry sis! As one who is enchanted watching a winter storm gather, I was completely taken into your picture of a nor'easter! Sending you Advent blessings of peaceful light, dear friend and a sturdy umbrella!
Ashley Avatar
December 12, 2024 at 8:40 AM
My Dearest Rhyme Time Friend, I am ever enchanted by your inspired response to my poem. I'm so happy to know you were "hypnotized" by my verse! A grand reward unto itself, my sweet poetry sis! Storms, blizzards and nor'easters always enthrall my spirit and imagination.. I'm so glad we both appreciate the magic and beauty of Nature's fury within and without ourselves. Thank you for your kindness and willingness to experience the clash of sane and bane with me :) Warmest wishes sent to you, my dear friend, on evergreen scents of Christmastime.. ~Susan
Rodrigues Avatar
November 20, 2024 at 1:26 PM
Such great imagery…yellow queens they quake… Beyond the hills the storm it brews, like coffee black...and so much more! Hugs ~ Kim
Ashley Avatar
November 21, 2024 at 8:43 AM
Dear Kim, I relish your uplifting comments. Thank you, creative poetess, for your time spent with me and my poem. Warmest wishes.. ~Susan
Anaya Avatar
November 20, 2024 at 10:15 AM
Brilliant first stanza, Susan, the aspens tremble do they not? Secondly, amazing comparison of brewing storm and coffee! Stormy dreams and intimate turbulence. The banshee imagery compelling. I'm held captive and fascinated as usual, poetess. Xhugs ~Anaya
Ashley Avatar
November 21, 2024 at 8:38 AM
Dearest Anaya, soulful poetess, I'm thrilled to know you were "held captive and fascinated" by my poem. Your amazing comments are prized, my sweet friend. Thank you for sharing your time with my poem and your precious thoughts with me. Your expressive nature is so uplifting and eloquent whether written in your golden verses or in my humble comment box. Warmest wishes and hugs.. ~Susan
Andresen Avatar
November 20, 2024 at 2:56 AM
- An impressive poem, Susan ... described with images of late autumn :) - hugs
Ashley Avatar
November 21, 2024 at 8:31 AM
Dear Anne-Lise, your shining presence here is uplifting. Thank you for your wonderful visit and lovely comments. Warmest wishes.. ~Susan
Wolf Avatar
November 19, 2024 at 10:51 PM
I can't imagine your tongue silenced, my dear friend... I guess I had better work on my imagination, eh?! ... Another gem, Susan. Bravo! :) Gershon
Ashley Avatar
November 21, 2024 at 8:30 AM
Haha! That's true dear Gershon! Although my poor husband wishes it could be "silenced" sometimes lol! Thank you, my poet friend, for your lighthearted remarks. Your presence here is surely appreciated. I'm glad you enjoyed this "gem" :)) Warmest wishes.. ~Susan
Hind Avatar
November 19, 2024 at 3:32 PM
Oh, I loved it! I like this form- but I find it really challenging. You did it justice- <3
Ashley Avatar
November 21, 2024 at 8:26 AM
Dear Paige, I like this form too and have written several poems using it. It is challenging but worth the poetic practice in writing in this form. For me, it helps to rein in my verbosity.. which can get out of hand sometimes haha! I'm so glad you enjoyed my poem. Thank you for your gracious visit and wonderful words. Warmest wishes my sweet poetry friend.. ~Susan
Buhagiar Avatar
November 19, 2024 at 9:03 AM
Great repetitive opening line to each stanza. Great imagery depicting the storm.
Ashley Avatar
November 21, 2024 at 8:22 AM
Dear Victor, thank you for your gracious visit and gratifying comments. Your shining presence on my poem's page is surely appreciated. Warmest wishes.. ~Susan
Dietrich Avatar
November 18, 2024 at 9:47 PM
What a cool poetry form. And the way each stanza began with the same line! Excellent writing
Ashley Avatar
November 21, 2024 at 8:22 AM
Dear Andrea, thank you for your wonderful visit and uplifting comments. Your shining presence on my poem's page is surely appreciated. Warmest wishes.. ~Susan
Greenhough Avatar
November 18, 2024 at 6:56 PM
What a storm this must be. I enjoyed its fury. I liked the Monchielle style.
Ashley Avatar
November 18, 2024 at 8:27 PM
Dear Hilda, it’s wonderful to see you. Yes, “fury” is a great word. I’m glad to know you enjoyed the intensity of this poem. Thank you for your kind thoughts. Warmest wishes.. ~Susan
M  Avatar
November 18, 2024 at 2:29 PM
So Beautifully written Susan....so many wonderful lines! Love it! Debx
Ashley Avatar
November 18, 2024 at 5:37 PM
Dear Deb, wonderful poetess, thank you for your gracious visit and encouraging comments. I'm so glad to know you enjoyed this poem. Your thoughts are treasured. Warmest wishes my sweet friend.. ~Susan
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