The Birdcage

The heart is a tapestry loosely sewn together with thread, each string a different section of the brain. Connecting the family string to the feelings string, the likes to the dislikes. All the knots representing the messy flow that's you. You have stories, feelings, and thoughts to share, knots where memories have been blended together. Your heart will never be as understood to anyone else than to you because you took the time to sew each individual string, choosing where it goes and why. Even you probably don't understand it, but no matter how hard someone tries they just can't deny that it is beautiful and perfectly you. And I'm jealous, because I wish I had the skill to sew a beautiful tapestry of thoughts and feelings. I wish I could pick out the strings as easily as colors of a rainbow. I wish I could choose what memories go where and what feelings go with. But I can't, because my heart’s not a tapestry. My heart is a bird cage, and the bird in it is the most beautiful bird you'll ever see and yet it continues to repeat the words of others instead of making its own. Spouting out thoughts and feelings like a hurricane while the cage only lets out what's mimicked, allowing only the words that others will accept to flow out of my mouth like citric acid and sink into yours like candy. My words deserve to come out like candy, to be sweet to the taste even if you don't like it, even if the taste burns on your tongue. Because this is not your voice to silence, it's mine, and I choose to unlock the bird's cage and bury the key where you'll never find it. My heart, my beautiful bird, screeches and screams, every thought mixing into each other like paint, you may not understand it but I've made paintings out of my pain, sketches out of my feelings, and stories out of my memories. The words that come out of my mouth are powerful and soaked in meaning even if that meaning washes right off of you like dirt. Because that dirt is laced with gold, you just have to want to take the time to find it, to treasure the broken words and piece them back together into the beautiful bird that is my heart. Your heart is a tapestry and mine is a bird cage, and in return for caring for my bird’s feathers and flaws, I'll always be willing to help sew your beautiful tapestry back together or even just listen to you until you yourself are ready to mend up the broken bits. Even if that means digging up the key and locking my bird back up, because at least it got to be free for a bit. Because no matter how much I try, I just can't get myself to deny that a tapestry will always be prettier than a bird stuck in a cage.