Standing Guard First Draft
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Ugh, this poem! I managed to get this draft out of a significant moment in my life. For me, it seems the obvious edit to start with is the first line. Giving a description where the reader has the impression of the infant being lonely or better yet vulnerable would be better than stating it. However, that simple change leads to rearranging the whole poem and cutting out parts that I actually like (can I bear to do it?). Then my brain explodes and leaves this draft in limbo. One day maybe . . .
You look lonely
Surrounded by hard plastic and
Lying under artificial yellow lights that reflect oddly off your pink newborn skin
Tiny fingers
Tiny toes
Synthetic oxygen mask
You’ve arrived a bit early little one
You’re exhausted mama’s arms have yet to joy in your gentle embrace
So, you’re daddy will stand guard for now
You’re not alone child
You’ll never be alone
Copyright © Robert Sidwell | Year Posted 2024
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