Christian Howes Poet Narrative

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So did your cloak and dagger swaggering self-flatter quite sufficiently?
Did you believe your baseless propaganda mantra would diminish me? 
Or that the instagrammed aggression of your engineered passivity would finish me?
There are no lies remain can yet disguise the truth of your proclivities.
That you've corrupted your own memories, repackaged them as history
Whilst blissfully you stuffed my mouth with words you never heard from me.
Then cynically declare them true for all the watching world to see
And hope in vain that they will mask your narcissistic tendencies. 

I may be flawed but in my heart of hearts I know I'm a good man
And I suppose, I thought despite it all we had a deeper plan? 
But nothing could be further from that ugliest of honest truths.
That in the end nothing I did was ever good enough for you. 
It didn't matter when I told you that I loved you every day. 
The more I tried the harder it became to put a smile upon your face. 
And you can hide behind the lies and fantasise that there were spies in play 
Turn me into what you need so you can throw our life away

Make me bleed it still won't put a stain on the reality. 
The truth remains, I'll say it plain to circumvent your vanity. 
You took the gains and the acclaim of everything you had from me. 
You've lied, decried and paralysed the thing that should have set us free
When something changed you couldn't even bear to be honest with me
You fed the flames and shift the blame but all your hubris can't contain 
The fact that in the end you hated yourself far too much to ever have loved me.

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