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So Visit I Will

So, visit I will Form Haibun: Comprising of prose followed by Haiku I was driving a conversion van, pulling a trailer with a smaller Suzuki X90 car on it. I was heading to California. This would be another change in my life. Although, I couldn’t get through the Rocky Mountains pulling that much weight. Thankfully, a friend had taken the ride with me and could drive the little car. I remember the most brilliant sunset across the desert when the blue sky was peeking through the fiery orange colors and looked like lakes in the distance, looking at it just right. I also remember the rainbow that crossed over the sky, too. I made it to California safely, for the second brief time that I lived there. But, I learned something in all this. It is not for me To live, but only visit So visit, I will 7/25/17

Copyright © | Year Posted 2017




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Date: 7/25/2017 9:40:00 PM
Heidi I think you did well with this form..best wishes in the contest
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Heidi Sands
Date: 7/26/2017 4:26:00 AM
Thank you so much Joseph. I appreciate your feedback with my first try at this. :)
Date: 7/25/2017 5:32:00 PM
Heidi, I have to agree with Dale. I am not an expert on free forms but I think your introduction is quite poetic in the imagery it musters in me. Good luck in the contest! - Dean
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Heidi Sands
Date: 7/25/2017 5:35:00 PM
Thanks so much Dean! I was trying to write a first Haibun poem, which begins with 'prose' paragraph first, which I don't write. So, this is what happened lol. Oh, and the contest required it to be about a trip.
Date: 7/25/2017 5:09:00 PM
Heidi, you rock! I worked for Suzuki for twenty years I ordered all the spare parts for the X-90 for the U.S. market and before that starting with the Samurai. I took early retirement to look after my aunt who is now eighty-tree and housebound. You're o.k. in my book! And considering your style I think it's incorrect to say your paragraph isn't poetic.
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Heidi Sands
Date: 7/25/2017 5:12:00 PM
Oh my word Dale! That is amazing! I really regretted selling my little Suzuki X-90, because didn't they only make them for 2 years?? I absolutely loved it and wanted to keep it, but had to sell it later. Thank you so much for your kind comment. I hope your retirement is going well and your aunt is ok. Take care :)
Date: 7/25/2017 4:08:00 PM
Hi Heidi, there is nothing wrong with your prose, it does describe the beauty of nature quite effectively, but it is simply prose and not really on the whole poetic, nothing wrong with it on that basis. So would be fine to enter a prose competition. The Haiku looks quite good. Best wishes, Mark.
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Heidi Sands
Date: 7/25/2017 4:37:00 PM
Thank you Mark. I appreciate your comment :) I have been trying new forms today for fun.

Book: Reflection on the Important Things