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Sinking To The Bottom

The tide cannot go on dark on my feet— in winter you move but 'specially move, but from within its grave, your bracing cease, this time of year where a fog I look through, in the sea that passed your own footprints by— in winter you move but 'specially move with a current that to my living cries like a wild channel, me to go to you, in the sea that passed your own footprints by; that beach still comes in waves, lost to my youth; I comb for our memory's ebb within— the forming seagulls in the ice air blew away. My part of you in deep ocean, though in the swell, your ghost returns, nimbus— I comb for our memory's ebb within as winter going out now approaches; the tide cannot go on dark on my feet, though in the swell, your ghost returns, nimbus— but from within its grave, your bracing cease.

Copyright © | Year Posted 2024




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Date: 8/18/2024 9:35:00 AM
The flow to this is excellent and you really have a great selection of words to compose the form..
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Date: 8/18/2024 6:47:00 AM
Your wordplay here like tide current etc to fit the theme of your poem is what stands out the most! Brilliant write as always dear paige! Nailed it with descriptive lines and creative articulation of words! I especially felt grief in “ My part of you in deep ocean, though in the swell, your ghost returns nimbus— I comb for our memory's ebb with” Sending you light always!
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Date: 8/18/2024 12:15:00 AM
This one feels sad. It is a very difficult form to do. So kudos on that. Well, goodnight, Paige. You are my last poet of this night.
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Date: 8/17/2024 4:27:00 PM
Paige, I love: the forming seagulls in the ice air blew away. Caught my attention! Hugs ~ Kim
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Date: 8/16/2024 7:33:00 PM
Very existential. Great you tried out a new format! Good job, Pangie
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Date: 8/16/2024 6:50:00 PM
I applaud your poem written in this difficult style. Seasonal changes in the ocean are dramatic.
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Book: Reflection on the Important Things