Silhouette

Sit down Do you feel? Are you there? Pull this bullet out of me I can't take the pain anymore, it digs itself deeper into me everyday. Who put it there? I'll leave you, bleed you dry like was done to me, it's all I know, all I'll ever know. I'm only closer to the light when you pull the death and darkness out of me, but I can't stomach the feelings it brings flooding in all at once. The jokes on me, this can't be cured, can't be fixed. My paradise is so different than yours, paradise for me is somewhere in my thoughts indefinitely. I like it there I am comfortable I am safe in my thoughts from reality No I do not feel I'm scared to I pull myself away from you and into myself more daily, into my distorted and twisted thoughts. Sometimes I do cry internally but not because I feel It is out if desperation and longing to be what you need, what you want me to be. I know I cannot be The woman I know I can't be for you, the one I maybe once was but has been lost and cannot ever be found. So far down I'm lost in the deepest ocean Too far gone now from your first vision of me, the girl you saw before just the silhouette of myself became a reality.