Should'Ve Would'Ve Could'Ve

Reality strikes Almost in a dreamlike state Slow motion However sudden Indifferent to any other Dreams turned to nightmare  instantly I feel so worthless For some time now A whore A **** Good for nothing Ruined. Not easy to acknowledge But this is how you made me feel. Almost protected you Nearly to the death You left me hung out to dry Hateful manner so cold You are your father's son Its about time you got told. Pushed away constantly Not just you Everyone. You are supposed to protect me Not turn my heart into stone. Left desolate Almost like I was just left there Left to die. Searching for solace A warm embrace Didn't want to feel alone Need love to fuel my strength. Took alot for me to let you in I would have let you win. Too late now, Go scrape the barrel, That's where you are going to have to start again. I have my own story Not full of excitement, laughs and glory . Contentment with brutality Isolated hurt Not  belonging anywhere. Trying to find myself I thought it was safe to let you in. Sad to say this is not the way I wanted our lives together to begin. Tired  of trusting those who fail me I gave you all the faith I could. Never enough Your insecurities  spilled over to me I thought it was fair that I shared them with you I let you in I didn't know I had to be strong for  both of us. Restart, Never I'm not sure if I'm stong enough to begin again Here I am Back at square one This time not just broken Here I am Right here in front of you Shattered Just how you left me We were almost there You see We could have been happy. Always been blamed Led to believe I need to live a life in shame. Nothings changed Different kind of man Lit a forever kind of flame. I thought you would walk the walk, Sadly, You could not even talk the talk. Judging me like you are God Nothing but a fool You won the 1st prize  with my heart Yet you always felt as though  you lost. Never wanting to ask Your back up against the wall I can't believe how you let me down I can't believe how you let me fall So many chances given to you to show me your strength, Sadly, I should've known better Would've saved me the disappointment Could've saved face when you fell from grace A lesson for my love Appreciate what is in front of you Not many get a chance at my love Talk to me, Let us gain strength  Enjoy our shared love It costed nothing, We could have been forever free. Kind to all but me Smiles shared to all but me Nice to all but me Anger and nastiness Trash I am not My special moments missed Because of your disdain. I really don't care For the reasons of your absence. You magnified your own pain. Should've left me alone Would've been left in one piece Could've been ok I should've pushed you away harder You would've never had a chance to drop me I could've been ok.