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Notes About The Poem

I was sitting in the truck while Cody handled something for me inside the store..A lady came across the parking lot with a pair of shoes on like these..Sara

She Walked

she walked stiff legged
balancing with difficulty...
wearing stilettoes 

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funnylifesenryu

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Jack Ellison

November 27, 2012 at 4:22 PM

Have never understood why women would torture themselves so. Harry suggested it must be like walking on a tight rope... I agree! Love and hugs, Jack xox

Russell Sivey

November 27, 2012 at 4:02 PM

Fabulous job my friend! I thoroughly enjoyed reading this delightful and fun poem this evening! Great work !!

Jack Horne

November 27, 2012 at 2:42 PM

lol, had a chuckle picturing this

Edward Orozco

November 27, 2012 at 8:53 AM

I like it.

Debbie Guzzi

November 27, 2012 at 8:31 AM

The primary difference between haiku & senryu is TONE, a senryu is often witty or satirical & unlike haiku, senryu do not include a kireji (cutting word), and do not generally include a kigo, or season word. Having man in the write doesn't necessarily make the 3 lines a senryu..above you have written a theme appropriate for a senryu BUT with an attempt at a cutting word [difficulty] which breaks the write into 2 parts, a common haiku format..so for me this is more haiku-like

Debbie Guzzi

November 27, 2012 at 8:38 AM

IF you tweaked it a wee bit you could push it diffently one way or the other [you MUST stay in the present tense] [the child walks/ stiff-legged across the floor /in stilettoes] diffinetely a senryu now because its FUNNY & 1 part not 2