Secretarial Race Car Ballerina

I wished I was a race car driver, but it took money, and I never had enough. And women did not do it back in the day, and now I get so many jollies racing other idiots on the freeway, I have my racing “fix” both to work and from work, so it is not my current wish. I wished I was a secretary, until I became on at a company where the other one had walked off mad, and seven men stood behind me waving hundreds of pages, yelling that they wanted me to type their proposals first. I lost forty-pounds in two weeks, and never got to go to the bathroom, finally quitting after a little nervous breakdown. The great news, is that my roommate was their former secretary, and we had lots of laughs at their expense while we recovered. I wished I was a ballerina But I never took dance lessons Then I tore my ACL and my Meniscus so now I barely walk plus I have arthritis in my feet and who wants to pay to see a hundred and eighty-nine pound sixty-seven-year-old with an apple stomach in a tutu? Maybe my grandchildren and the kids at school, and my arch enemy, Sheila.