Scratched

There are gaps in the particleboard; quince wads fill the breaches. Nicotine newspapers underlay the linoleum. It's a rented place, he tiptoes around its yellow layers. He has a friend he visits on Sunday afternoons. The walls of her bedsit are paper thin. She thinks her neighbors scratch on them; thinks they are writing to her. She will stand in front of him naked, eyes closed while they both masturbate. She wants him to watch her. She's frightened people will overhear. This is all the sex she needs; she tells him. Afterward, they sit side by side on the small bed reading the tabloids. Then they walk to a local pub, sit quietly in a corner, not talking, holding hands until closing time. She becomes a missing person. He scans headlines, obituary columns, classified ads. Her parents live in Surrey, that's all he knows. On the other side of the city, he lands a job with a room in a hotel. He stops looking for her. His new room is narrow, clean and white. He stops smoking; remembers the silence once shared.