Santa We've Been Outta Touch

Santa Claus, we’ve been out of touch and I don’t ask for very much but I have needs, and I’m in Dutch I want to see the light of day oh, and can you give me a sleigh and a way to forget yesterday can I have a smiling face and something that will erase memories of a certain place give me something that doesn't kill a beautiful lady with an iron will a lonely howl, my bones to chill a wolf that travels all alone a strange, unringing telephone a statute with a heart of stone a walk on a sandy beach a dream that I can almost reach and something you can't teach I want to know how Santa would feel about forgotten souls in a world that's real when he slips on a banana peel a little train engine that chugs a hard-shell carapace for bugs and shelter for a thousand slugs a wounded soldier in a field a red pin cushion and a shield a blood slick broadsword I can wield I want tree sides that grow no moss and to know who is the boss but I won’t wear an iron cross I want to meet the missing link when I look to the sky to think I want to see two blue eyes that blink and sing a song I haven't heard unknown to every beast and bird burned from a childhood, blurred and while I hear those eyes that sing give me a butterfly with a broken wing to match a broken arm and sling an old jalopy that's turned to rust thirty pizzas, but just the crust and a faithful servant that I can trust the whistle from an outbound freight a starving stowaway in a crate a fugitive on the interstate I want a fleet of Yankee clippers and dolphins, with rubbery flippers who open their mouths with zippers Santa, give me another drink something, this year, that doesn't stink an inkwell that's not devoid of ink a voice that sings que sera sera another punch and a broken jaw a man made of old clothes and straw a street slickened with blood and rain a tangled derailed bicycle chain another year, minus the pain a secret that no one will tell but everybody knows so well of a not so well-hidden hell invite the dormouse and mad hatter pile everything up on a platter and act as if nothing's the matter dig up some bodies from the bog a streetlight to cut through the fog an ambulance and a mangy dog put it all by the Christmas tree I expect delivery to be free don't forget a replacement for my knee I'm wondering if I could obtain a certification that I am sane and in a ribboned box, a brain a circus tent filled with friends as invisible fate that portends that they will come to tragic ends a three wheeled magic scooter a never-miss, precision peashooter a teapot made of pewter a field where it never rains a ghost who can't escape his chains a place for his remains a disappointing piece of mail slipping the grasp of fingers frail an excited wagging tail give me pipes that never leak a woman who won't wake me up to shriek and floorboards that don't creak give me a scene, fine and grand the grasping hands of the damned and show me Custer's one last stand remember me to the gang rope me to a tree to hang to a church bell's unrelenting clang I'd like one rabbit and one hare an ugly face, an angry glare and a teaspoon of despair a town from centuries gone by where people live but never die and never hear the word "goodbye" doughnuts without their holes live, fresh bait and fishing holes woods filled with wandering souls give me a wide saw tooth grin a water bucket to put it in and give me Huckleberry Finn I want two knees with lots of scratches give me forty thousand matches and an egg that never hatches give me animals that you can't tame set my house and barn aflame let the devil take the blame throw all the pills down the drain give me a talking weathervane and a disappearing train give me tickets to the fare to see things that are not there when I look up into the air give me wild Canadian geese throw out my pants that have a crease set me free, I want release find me a treasure chest that's oaken give me words that can be spoken when everything is broken won't you give me my last meal stamp my forehead with a seal that signifies that I was real find my lover, drag the lake bake me a tall wedding cake cancel every bad mistake give me soup with bones and gristle hold the rose, give me the thistle teach my dog to whistle a refrigerator magnet's face a box packed with curtain lace an imaginary warm embrace a knick-knack that badly needs repairs a porcelain cat that only stares and always catches me unawares if you know someone who cares would you push me down the stairs and include me in your prayers along with holidays and good wishes I want you to do the dishes and fill the sea with floating fishes as you sit at your laptop, deliveries graphing the busy elves, that you are staffing complain about your jolly laughing ask those workshop elves and slackers to give me Easter eggs and firecrackers I'll pay you a thousand smackers sorry, Santa, my mind went on the blink hold on a minute, just let me think I want only a kitchen sink