'rona

How dare you show up unannounced Changing the way I live my best life Coming all up and thru here confining me inside the prison of my own insanity I want to break from these walls and defy everything they say about you Ignore the demands your presence has forced me to follow I curse the day you arrived because all I can do from the wee hours of the night to the early morning dawn is lie in waiting as I make love to my own boredom with no one there to hold me except my own scared loneliness For weeks I've waited watch the clock tick tock in sync with the palpitations of my heart where my thoughts of your wrath create the rhythm my anxiety dances a jig to I want to walk out in the sun smell the aroma of life and touch a dream but if I take that risk without protective armor I'll be kissed with your deadly nightmare I attempt to find ways to distract my resentment for you as you adamantly succeed at keeping me away from those I desperately need the most I want to feel the thick of my man's laughter in my ear See the smiles of my friends and family that are locked behind the gates of masks and bandanas This can't be life A new normal you've introduced to me that has brought on way too much confusion far too many lies and half truths while slanging more conspiracy theories than a drug dealer slangs dope I'm afraid and shook while my fears are quarantined from my courage That "S" I have on my chest is now susceptible to being contaminated with a scarlet letter from a pandemic alphabet I don't know who I am anymore I don't remember the last time I remembered I'm to busy anticipating trying to forget If I pray or wish you away you'd still be here proving that death becomes you but I refuse to let you meet me at the threshold to become the death of me 4-5-2020