Notes About The Poem


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written on 09/20/22

Rise Up and Sing the Sun

Break forth, o dawn! Rise up and sing the sun
from underneath the hills into the light.
Put out the crimson fires and take a run
through azure laced with lazy wisps of white.

To sleep, o moon! It’s time for you to wane
and nestle in below the canopy.
Dear child, there is no need for you to strain
or stretch. Just rest; put off that jealousy!

Stand down, o stars, and watch above them all!
Go, fade away into the bright of day,
and light again to hold them in your thrall
when dark no longer can be held at bay.

The unseen hand thus orchestrates their course,
as they, in turn, reflect their gloried source.
Copyright © | Year Posted 2022

Poem

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Dillenbeck Avatar
October 15, 2022 at 8:16 AM
I am hearing a great anthem melody here, which I can't quite remember where I have heard. Anyway, amazing potential as a powerful hymn to creation's beauty and integral truths.
Chunn Avatar
October 8, 2022 at 5:44 PM
Another great write Jeff. I love the flow. Congratulation on your placement.
Kyser Avatar
October 8, 2022 at 6:49 PM
Thanks so much, Andy! Have a great day!
Ashley Avatar
October 8, 2022 at 9:45 AM
Dear Jeff, the metaphorical beauty of your sonnet is breathtaking! The sprinklings of alliteration and assonance along with amazing rhythm and rhymes show off your brilliant technical artistry as well. Congratulations for your excellent win in Mark's contest. Warmest wishes.. ~Susan
Kyser Avatar
October 8, 2022 at 3:30 PM
Susan, your comments are so gracious and kind. Thank you, and I am glad you enjoyed the poem!
George Avatar
October 7, 2022 at 9:00 PM
A lovely sonnet that shall brighten up anyone's mood ! I like the thought of the 'unseen hand that orchestrates everything'. Congratulations on your great win in the prestigious Marathon Mile Contest....
Kyser Avatar
October 8, 2022 at 3:31 PM
Thanks so much, Valsa. Yes, I do believe He holds all things together!
Toney Avatar
October 7, 2022 at 10:34 AM
"Break forth, o dawn! Rise up and sing the sun". (I'm going to remember that perfect first line.) "To sleep, o moon!" "Stand down o stars." Jeff, your sonnet is beautiful from start to finish. And your last two lines give credit where credit is due. A Fav for me. Congratulations on your podium finish on Mile 15 of my 2022 Poetry Marathon Contest. Keep your running shoes on, because Mile 16 has already started. Also, check out my blog post to view your current standing in the Marathon.
Kyser Avatar
October 7, 2022 at 10:44 AM
So glad you enjoyed this, Mark. I liked the way it rolled out. And thanks for the hard work on all these contests!
Poet Avatar
September 21, 2022 at 1:08 PM
You did a great job, Jeff. Your verses almost sing aloud as you skillfully build metaphors inside them. As I read the first stanza, I could hear it being performed on stage in my brain. Enjoyed reading this.
Kyser Avatar
September 21, 2022 at 1:35 PM
So glad you enjoyed it! Thanks for your wonderful compliments.
Fowler Avatar
September 21, 2022 at 6:16 AM
Fabulous Jeff! Heavenly write - I enjoy this tremendously! LA
Kyser Avatar
September 21, 2022 at 1:35 PM
Thanks so much, Linda!
Lawless Avatar
September 21, 2022 at 5:50 AM
WOW....DOUBLE WOW....If this doesn't make it to POTD I may have to boycott it. I'll FAV it in hopes it spurs the algorithm's imagination.
Kyser Avatar
September 21, 2022 at 6:34 AM
Thanks, John. There has been a LOT of good writing on the Soup here recently - great encouragement and motivation to lift at least some of my thoughts higher! :-)
Hankins Avatar
September 20, 2022 at 8:29 PM
Very nice, my friend. Your images are well-placed among phrases that almost sing. In fact, as I read the first stanza it ran through my mind as a song. I love it.
Tor Avatar
September 20, 2022 at 5:41 PM
Jeff your creative side shines in this one. Enjoyed reading, thanks for sharing. Have a good evening.
Kyser Avatar
September 21, 2022 at 1:35 PM
A belated thank you for your gracious comments!
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