Relaxing At Home

When I strut through the door- It is time to celebrate the end of another day! Feeling victorious for a moment. Spending the evening telling myself that I am happy. But I say it more thoughtlessly each time. Feeling satisfied is the appropriate response to the end of the day. It was a really hard day. The hardest day ever. I’m just trying to relax. Because I worked really hard…. Instead I am feeling reckless. Here on this chair. In this silent room. Every time I try to stand, I become dizzy. It’s never the right time to go to bed. I’m always in the middle of some trivial thought. And I can’t seem to notice when one begins and one ends. I eventually fall asleep in the middle of some argument. I wake up in the morning. But not to an alarm. Which is good because I don’t have to work. So I can stay focused. And continue relaxing.