Reflection

Looking into the mirror what do I see a strong black woman standing before herself with no insecurities with no sorrow a voice that dominates a room a woman who needs no one to tell her how important she is? no that is not the woman I see standing before me I see a soulless little girl trapped in a grown woman body with insecurities that no one understands I see a woman who is in desperate need to find searching time after time. A sad little girl who yearns to be held who desires to be the picture perfect woman that can stand on my own a spineless woman who rather have people in my life who uses and abuses me then face the world alone I see a butterfly trapped in a cocoon with no way out a smile that has no meaning a voice that can't be heard too scared to look people in the eye threaten by others afraid to think afraid to speak I see a woman who has no beliefs no faith a woman who dwells on what others opinion and let them define the woman they will appreciate A woman who feels nothing that I do is ever good enough for me and focus on the good. What good? When I'm doing things that shouldn't be done. A self hatred is what I see a woman begging fighting crying to be set free