Reaching

rudiments of the day progress like every other matches burning 1 by 1 so quick one can lose count & if the practice is to tally up the path to death step by step by step (as if the physical attributes of age will not knock on the door daily), then by all means, kudos--- even so, the pain grows within, as the human disintegrates so comes the disease so comes the long term side-effects of short term, uncalculated risk & the suffering can show its ugly face in little coughs little headaches that go away with tylenol (at first), miniscule aches, gurgling in the stomach, itching seemingly everywhere, hotness bridging on fever, darkening or reddening of the skin, painful pissing, an unkind throbbing in the genitals, general fatigue mixed up in a cocktail of an escalation in sweating, diarrhea & chills that cause one to shake like a tambourine at a brazilian folk rock concert. when it comes, it hits like tyson’s uppercut sending the innocent reeling trying to identify the place of inner destruction falling to one’s knees out of necessity to keep the spasm at bay as best as one can & that is when one who says that they hold beliefs in something outside themselves cries out--- said individuals will exclaim the names of the numerous deities, ghosts, illusions & really anything else that the mind can be willed to conjure up--- but the fit continues as the body envelopes the storm crashing with lightening & thunder, waves rising & lowering, chaos fluctuating at a rapid pace & still, no one comes to the aid of the individual & the room so empty, offers no solace. reaching for anything that might cease the terror reaching for something that might stop it all ready to forsake it all or sign up to any new ideal that would simply claim to correct in full what is presently pressing upon them.