Pushed Up By My Heart

How disappointing, My excitement prior to this moment. It’s the same outcome every time, but I always am hopeful. Hair styled to seem natural, Make-up giving me an angelic appeal— Should have been perfect. I should stand out. He looks to me slowly, Then continues to cover the rest. My lips must be just too red, My shirt faded blue. I keep anticipating conversation, Maybe more than just “hello” and “how are you”. But he’s got his eye on someone now, She looks kissed by the sun, Peachy cheeks cosmetics can’t get just right. He leans in towards her, Sizing her breasts, hips and thighs. I continue smiling, Feelings at the back of my throat, Pushed up by my heart. He says “Thank you, better luck next time.” All us pink ladies file out, Fingertips sweating onto our scripts as We throw them in our bag with all the rest. Usually I tell myself “next time”, But I can’t seem to bare anymore no’s.