Pretending

Pretending Im fine faking the smiles forcing the laughs its all i have left im far from happy far from being stable im unsure how long iLL be able to keep this up pretending everythings fine when nothing seems right everythings all messed up nothing seems to matter anymore all the hugs are meaningless you look at me but never really see never truly looking into my eyes never grasping the fact that i am dieing inside but i keep pretending the love i receive is all true im denying the truth stuck in the lies and deceit my heart is in two and theres nothing you can do to patch the hole in my chest too many times ive cried believing all the lies always wishing i would die but i keep pretending never showing all the pain im feeling my smile stays painted on but how long can i go on pretending...