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Press '1' For English

I grew a beard
while waiting for you
it looks more and more
like I'll never get through

My left ear was aching
I switched to my right
This perpetual holding
has no end in sight

I wish I'd have noticed
before such great cost
that your phone number spells out
800-GET-LOST

Though I pressed '1' for English
I am thinking now
pressing '12' for Braille
might work better somehow

My friends have all passed on
my children have grown
while I have been sitting here
holding this phone

Your toll-free number
is anything but
with pulse-pounding migraine
and a pain in my butt

Yes, I was clean shaven
when this number I called
but now I'm all wrinkled
and dammit I'm bald!

My bones they will find
still sitting right here
the telephone clenched
where once was my ear

And your endless recording
monotonous, dull
will be amplified through
my cold empty skull

Copyright © | Year Posted 2019




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Date: 7/4/2019 12:06:00 PM
This is hilarious! A favorite for sure! Blessings Michael, Susan
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Michael Wise
Date: 10/18/2019 3:26:00 AM
Many thanks Susan! :)
Date: 2/3/2019 7:54:00 AM
Hello Michael Wise, as i read this poem I had a good laugh. A nice way to begin my day. Have a nice day my friend.
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Michael Wise
Date: 2/3/2019 8:37:00 AM
Thank u Darlene! Glad to be a part of starting your day in a positive way! :)
Date: 1/21/2019 4:00:00 AM
O this is such fun! I love the 1800 GET LOST! Excellent!
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Michael Wise
Date: 1/21/2019 7:15:00 AM
LOL Thank u P.S.! :)
Date: 1/16/2019 9:24:00 PM
Another and hilarious poem Michael. I love it.
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Michael Wise
Date: 1/16/2019 9:29:00 PM
Glad to hear that Susan, thank u! :)
Date: 1/11/2019 10:16:00 AM
This is hilarious, clever, humorous, and a fav!
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Michael Wise
Date: 1/11/2019 2:53:00 PM
Glad u enjoyed it Sunlite! :)
Date: 1/10/2019 6:28:00 PM
G'day Michael … great. How true is your verse. These company's drive you bloody mad. You feel like pressing the nuclear numbered button. Thank you Michael - Lindsay
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Michael Wise
Date: 1/10/2019 6:34:00 PM
LOL! Very true Lindsay! Thank u for stopping by! :)
Date: 1/10/2019 2:29:00 PM
Hello Michael! This made me smile!
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Michael Wise
Date: 1/10/2019 2:36:00 PM
I'm glad to hear that! And I think we can all relate to this! Thanks Valerie! :)

Book: Radiant Verses: A Journey Through Inspiring Poetry