Post Trauma

Post Trauma At night when midnight comes to call I lie, afraid to go to sleep. I know the terrors that will crawl From the dream chest where I keep The sounds, the smells, the sights that roam The dark recesses of my mind From some broken chromosome The broken soul I left behind. The animal portion of my brain From some prehistoric day Asserts itself, begins its reign, Elbows the thinking part away Mobilizing heart and limb Ready to fight and scream and die Ready to act on ancient whim Act with never asking “why?” The sense of balance I once bore Was shredded on that battlefield. Blown to fragments, soaked with gore Mixed with fear that will not yield. The shock and awe of death unwelcome Sent my sense of reason reeling. And now when the fires of Hell come I stand frozen and unfeeling. I don't want comfort, won’t cry out. I’m only safe when I’m alone. In my internal walkabout I cannot take you, though you moan. You in the world of sense and light Can’t begin to comprehend How with the never ending fright I can never have a friend. Perhaps this demon may be slain Through some intensive meditation, Or reaching deep inside my brain Some sedating medication. But I will wait till my angel comes Whether spirit, flesh or flame. To free me from the madding drums And give me back my soul and name. (The preface to my novel 'Invisible" available on Amazon)