Poor Pandora
We ponder Pandora as the person preordained
to unleash a plethora of plagues upon our persons.
But here's what I heard:
Pandora had two sisters,
Persephone and Proserpina.
Pandora perused poetry
while Persephone practiced petite-point.
But Proserpina possessed the predilection
for picking on people.
She pestered the portly, poor, pretty and plain.
Her past preceded her.
Their parents were pleased when the prince
invited Pandora and Persephone to a party
he was planning at the palace.
He passed on Proserpina.
She pouted.
Then she paced, plotted and planned.
She proceeded to the pantry where Penelope,
her mother, kept the panko and the peppercorns
for her pop-ups and where Papa, the apothecary,
placed the key to the padlock
on his painted pagoda wherein
he kept his potions
and the preponderance of his prescriptions.
She purloined the key, padded through the parlor
past the piano and out through the pass way.
But the key wouldn't fit properly.
Thus she picked at the padlock with a pin
until it popped.
Within she found the parcel of reputed poisons.
She placed it on the patio,
pulling open the top.
The package put forth a protuberance
of pestilence so putrid
Proserpina had to plug her proboscis.
At her trial, she pleaded not guilty.
When the prosecution posited,
Proserpina prevaricated.
When he probed, she pandered.
Then Penelope professed
that it was Proserpina who pestered
people and that her past preceded her
which was why the prince passed her over
for the party.
Proserpina then plotted to pick the padlock
on the pagoda with a pin
until it performed,
placing the parcel on the patio
and producing the pestilence.
Penelope knew this because she'd stood pie-eyed
in the portico
while her preening, pretend princess
pirouetted about the place.
Proserpina was Papa's particular favorite,
but no matter how he plead for pardon
the Provost would not be placated.
He pronounced Proserpina's punishment
was to pray as a penitent postulate
in a particularly penurious part of purgatory.
Pretty soon Pandora wed the prince
in a pageant of such pomp
few in the plutocracy had ever purported
to be a part of.
Persephone married Peter Piper;
as part of the prenuptial she procured
a plenitude of pickled peppers:
she preferred not a partner predisposed
to pilfer produce.
Papa premiered an emporium
and became the pontiff of potions.
Penelope's pop-ups were so popular
she opened a pie shop where people
could purchase a passel of pastries.
The papers stopped printing
pieces on Proserpina.
The purpose of the proverb:
to give poor Pandora a pass for Pete’s sake.
Copyright © Dale Gregory Cozart | Year Posted 2017
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