Pie Anyone

Don’t often see him

7/8 asleep

But I’m sometimes surprised

Brushing my feet

Purring and arching

And pushing up high

Ecstasy shows in a half closed eye

Black white and furry

Real smooth to the touch

But not really keen on fussing that much

So soft and cuddly you fail to remember

He has in his mind a deadly agenda

 

Hey human, scratch me here, scratch me there

You only think that you’re covered in hair

You feed me Iams and think I’m so nice

But I really prefer the heads of live mice

The warden of the garden on constant patrols

Listening for sounds like the digging of moles

One eyes the ground the other the sky

Watching and waiting for things that might fly

For this week I have but one major goal

To tear that magpie another arsehole

 

He goes for me when he can, him and his mate

One will tease me from my lair the other lies in wait

 

They got me in a tree one day I was hanging off one paw

Down came the magpie crow, I couldn’t hold on much more

One quick peck and I let go

Bloody hard that beak you know

Hit a few branches way below

Crash -landed on the floor

 

I’ll get some food, maybe a nap and

Lick my paw like nothing has happened

I’ll strut and swagger and act so sublime

Knowing that pie is on borrowed time

 

I go out at night while they aren’t around

Scout around and find some new ground

Under a bush I make a new lair

Lie in wait for my friend of the air

 

I eat a few moths spend a night on the tiles

And maybe I’ll doze for a time

Aha they’re near you can hear them for miles

If he lands up close he’s mine

 

Hello Jake you look all smug

After your night on the town

You had better get on to your rug

And have a good lie down

 

Dream a dream of shredded bird

Dying all a quiver

Bet you didn’t expect me

To be chewing on your liver

 

Sorry about the garden mess

Hope it doesn’t make you queasy

We had a tear up I must confess

And he came apart real easy

- this is a poem by my dad about our pet cat "jakey"

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Beata Agustin

Date: 8/20/2025 5:05:00 AM

Thanks for sharing this... exposing your thoughts through your unique poetic style. Meanwhile, I greet you with the love of the Lord, expressed by John 3:16 of the Bible, "For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life." Be blessed.

Jan Allison

Date: 4/27/2017 10:51:00 AM

Hi Glinda, what a fabulous fun poem your dad has written. I can relate so much to the vivid description as we used to have a cat and it is so accurate in the way they behave .. ours used to leave a 'head' and entrails on the doorstep so this really made me smile:-) Welcome to Poetry soup:-) hugs Jan xx